Jen Lancaster
Jen Lancaster
JenniferLancasteris an American author whose titles have appeared on the New York Times bestseller list. As of August 2015, she has twelve published books...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionAuthor
CountryUnited States of America
girl simple hands
Although I get a lot of specialty services like wraps, scrubs, and mustache removal, my favorite is the simple manicure/pedicure. They work on your hands and feet at the same time while you sit in a vibrating chair. I call it the sorority girls version of a threesome.
workout hate sleep
Really? If I could hate my trainer? That would be ideal. I'd prefer to despise this person with the fire of ten thousand suns. So when I walk - nay, crawl - out of here at the end of my workouts, I want to lull myself to sleep by picturing my very talented and inspirational trainer getting hit by a bus. A bus that I am driving.
miranda samantha charlotte
Point? Maybe you aren't a Carrie or a Samantha or a Charlotte or a Miranda. Maybe you're just you.
running nice dark
Maybe I've moved to the dark side, but it's clean and nice and we never run out of toilet paper.
jobs clever writing
I've determined the ideal job for me is one where I can write clever essays about my life and my employer will give me enough money not only to live a comfortable existence, but also to buy many, many new pairs of shoes.
baby believe records
For the record? I have never been her baby. In fact, I reject the notion of coming out of her body. I prefer to believe I was hatched, or perhaps purchased.
mind
Fortunately, all it takes for us to be of one mind is some buttercream frosting.
children couple careers
I don't care how happily married you are or how deeply enmeshed you are with your children and family and career -- every woman needs a couple of chicks who'll break out the sangria just because you need to vent.
believe taken choices
No matter how happy anyone is with their choices, I believe it's human nature to wonder about the path not taken.
thinking self keys
I’m instantly mortified by my fat, uncontrollable mouth, but that’s when it occurs to me that my humor is a self-defense mechanism. Even though I may come off like a stark raving asshat, being funny is the most important tool I have to stay sane. The ability to say what I think is the key to allowing me to feel in control.
perspective missing tears
The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously. Do I miss the package I came in at 25? I do. Gravity is no one's friend. Yet the perspective I've gained is so worth the wear and tear. What would have mortified me at 25 is now simply fodder for a funny, relatable story. Also? I was a waitress at 25, and now I'm an author. Forty-five is definitely better.
began life running
I began writing fiction when I started running out of material in my own life.
change eye future limit tastes
I don't want to limit myself as a writer. Tastes change, and I want to keep my eye on the future.
delivered exactly life manage virtual
I could manage my life so much better if an app could tell me exactly when my parcels will be delivered so I don't spend the day under virtual house arrest.