Henry Beard
Henry Beard
Henry Nichols Beardis an American humorist, one of the founders of the magazine National Lampoon and the author of several best-selling books...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
CountryUnited States of America
golf appreciate firsts
It's often necessary to hit a second shot to really appreciate the first one.
imagine ashtrays
I simply cannot imagine why anyone would eat something slimy served in an ashtray.
funny flower autumn
Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again.
weed flower vegetables
Hoeing: A manual method of severing roots from stems of newly planted flowers and vegetables.
golf
Bets lengthen putts and shorten drives.
garden years definitions
The true definition of a perennial: Any plant which, had it lived, would have bloomed year after year.
golf nonchalant golf-jokes
Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts.
golf wind swings
If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just to see how far you can get the ball to go.
lying golf play
"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf
golf water balls
A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.
golf two groups
Fairway: a narrow strip of mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.
golf tennis beginners
Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.
golf enough missed-ones
A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.