George Carlin
George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlinwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 5–4 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth12 May 1937
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
The older you get, the better you realize you were.
If you nail a tool shed closed, how do you put the hammer away?
If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?
I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
Y'ever notice how you never seem to get laid on Thanksgiving? I think it's because all the coats are on the bed.
How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
We will never be an advanced civilization as long as rain showers can delay the launching of a space rocket.
When will all the rhetorical questions end?
I go to bed early; my favorite dream comes on at nine.
I'll tell you a little secret about the Blues: it's not enough to know which notes to play, you have to know why they need to be played.
I was once dancing with a woman who told me she had a yeast infection so I told her to bake me some bread.
Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony with that big hammer slams it on the head of the person who lost the most money that day.
When I first heard the song Don't worry - be happy I realized it was exactly the kind of mindless philosophy that Americans would respond to. It would make a great national anthem along with Me first.
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loath and despise the groups they identify or belong to.