George Carlin
George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlinwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 5–4 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth12 May 1937
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
When you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the Freak Show. And when you're born in America, you're given a front row seat. And some of us get to sit there with notebooks.
I hope we're not just human garbage drifting toward a big sewer. But I think so.
If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?
As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing.
Like on the airlines, they say they want to 'pre-board'. Well, what the hell is 'pre board'? What does that mean? To get on before you get on?
Tonight's forecast: DARK. Continued mostly dark tonight, turning to wildly scattered light in the morning
I never worry that all hell will break loose. My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.
If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense? What year did Jesus think it was?
The safest place to be during an earthquake would be in a stationary store.
When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
The Human Species could have been great but instead we became satisfied with lights on our tennis shoes.
My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place.
No one is ever more him/herself than when they really laugh. Their defenses are down. It's very Zen-like, that moment. They are completely open.
So I want to thank the Pentagon, the Soviet Union and the military-industrial complex from the bottom of my heart. Without them, I could never have become the man I am today.