Eugene Mirman
Eugene Mirman
Eugene Boris Mirmanis a Russian-born American comedian and writer. Mirman is known for playing Yvgeny Mirminsky on Delocated, and voicing Gene Belcher on the animated comedy Bob's Burgers...
NationalityRussian
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth24 July 1974
CountryRussian Federation
beer awkward alchemist
You are an alchemist who can turn six beers into an awkward three week relationship.
freedom-of-speech want forget
I forget, is freedom of speech when it's legal to say what you want or is it when it has no consequences for some reason?
thinking
A lot of the things I do are the sort of things I think are funny.
lying thinking play
What do you think you should do if you're attacked by a bear? Play dead? No - that's a lie promoted by the bears.
giving needs overwhelming
If things are really overwhelming and you need to talk, you can give me a call at 347-273-2044.
boys years aspergers
God is a twelve year old boy with Asperger's.
girl baby sex
Boys have penises and girls have vaginas. If they touch at the wrong time, you can make a baby or die.
hurt children butterfly
I saw this huge billboard that said: 'Abortion Hurts' and then it had a drawing of a butterfly. Who is that for? Is there a lady who's going to see that and be like, 'Oh, I was going to get an abortion but now that I realize it hurts I guess I'll just give birth to a child! 'Cause I know that's painless and raising it should be a snap!'
thinking people underwear
What I think you should do is imagine people in their underwear but then also imagine them crying, and that - that is truly relaxing.
moving eye waiting
Of course, to avoid getting stuck in that convo with someone you dislike or feel uncomfortable around, don't be passive, be proactive. Do not let them direct your interaction on their terms, do it on yours. Ask a Misdirection Question--something too difficult to answer quickly--e.g., 'What's Congress up to?' or 'You ever learn any cool science?' When you ask the question, don't make eye contact, keep moving and get out of there. Do not wait for a response and deny ever asking it. Repeat these actions until you are never again spoken to by that individual (about four times).
treasure retarded pretending
If no one figures out you are pretending to be retarded, your life will be greeted with treasure.
space people alternatives
Comedy clubs were something that came to pass in the '80s, but toward the end of that, in the early '90s, people started doing comedy again in alternative spaces.
children home bully
Most bullies are the product of a stressful and often abusive home life. Next time a bully threatens or attacks you, just yell, 'Don't abuse me like your parents abuse you!' Then call children's services and tell them you saw this bully crying in the bathroom and you're worried about him. Bam! He just got moved to a foster home.
love two people
Marriage is when two people love each other so much that they promise that if they ever, ever stop they'll fill out tons of paperwork.