Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
ideas two sentences
Artistically, I find jokes really satisfying aesthetically, because there's something great about getting an idea down to a sentence or two.
night years two
Conclusions are based in time. We live in time. So any definition of success is bound up with time. With other things you can say, "Can I yo-yo? Can I juggle?" Usually you have a pretty small window in which to get your answer. Stand-up is different. You can't do stand-up for one night and say, "Am I a funny stand-up comedian?" In two months or two years you'll start to realize it.
two people internet
It feels like every day or two, people on Twitter and the Internet are outraged about something.
two stories comedy
It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.
two waiting use
Sometimes, when something really great happens to me, I like to wait two weeks before I tell anyone about it, because I like to use the word 'fortnight'.
artist self two
THING TO TRY: If you are asked to describe a suspect to a police sketch artist, describe in precise detail, the features of the police sketch artist. This is one of the rare instances where two people can do one self-portrait.
distance two lines
The shortest distance between two idiots is a conga line.
two annoying god-bless-you
Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.
dog two sweaters
I saw a dog wearing a sweater and I thought that looked ridiculous 'cause dogs don't have arms. If you're going to put clothes on the dog, you should put two pairs of pants on it.
stupid zippers two
There are two kinds of jackets - reversible, and reversible but it's hard to zipper up and it looks really stupid.
asked met name trust women
I like women, but you can't always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dog's name and then I asked, 'Does he bite?' and she said, 'No.' And I said, 'So how does he eat?' Liar!
love punch structured
I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punch line.
location toys adults
It's very easy to turn a toy into an adult toy: Location, location, location.
life bookstores mystery-novels
If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find.