Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
firsts my-favorite first-time
Usually my favorite joke is whichever joke I most recently came up with that surprised me the first time I thought of it.
weather firsts sometimes
Sometimes I like to go outside without even checking the weather first.
paper towels firsts
Automatic paper towel dispensers are a solution to something that was never a problem in the first place.
thinking firsts hard
I think, at first blush, the '60s always enticed me. There's something about the '60s, it's not hard to like it.
funny humor firsts
I bought a dictionary. First thing I did was, I looked up the word "dictionary", and it said "you're an asshole".
class firsts fart
I don't usually fly in first class, but I fart in first class.
ideas training firsts
When I first heard the term 'training bra,' I was freaked out. I was pretty young and I said, 'Did you just say training bra? They're training their chests? I had no idea.' See some lady, her boobs are everywhere. 'What's her deal?' Those are untrained titties.
asked met name trust women
I like women, but you can't always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dog's name and then I asked, 'Does he bite?' and she said, 'No.' And I said, 'So how does he eat?' Liar!
love punch structured
I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punch line.
location toys adults
It's very easy to turn a toy into an adult toy: Location, location, location.
life bookstores mystery-novels
If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find.
funny jigsaw says wanna
I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says 'go outside.'
creative needs tests
To be creative, first I need to be really organized. If my apartment's messy I need to clean it. It's like before you start doing your homework or studying for a test, you have to have a clean room.
self years ive-learned
What I've learned about my self over the years is that I'm pretty restless. If I multitask it's probably because I have difficulty just focusing on one thing.