Chris Rock
Chris Rock
Christopher Julius "Chris" Rock III is an American comedian, actor, and producer...
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth7 February 1965
CityAndrews, SC
funny grandma kids
If a kid calls his grandma "Mommy" and his mama "Pam", he's going to jail!
daddy bed poor
We were so poor my daddy unplugged the clocks when we went to bed.
ghetto soda mediums
When you've been on a ghetto diet your entire life, you're just happy to get a large soda instead of a medium.
jobs president like-you
The thing about Barack Obama, just from being around him, is he's cooler than the other politicians, but just nerdy enough to do the job. Like you can't be really cool and be the president.
clothes comedian emperor
Comedians are the one who have to tell the emperor he has no clothes on.
giving people rest-of-your-life
An entertainer's reputation as a live act is the most valuable thing he or she can have. If people know you give good shows, you'll never be broke for the rest of your life.
white laughing people
People basically aren't that racist. They want their laughs. If I make a white guy laugh, he's gonna come see me. He's not gonna go see the white guy who doesn't make him laugh just because that guy is white.
athlete comedian matter
Being a comedian is a lot like being an athlete. If you're Carl Lewis and you're the fastest, then no matter what you're the fastest.
funny sports humor
Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.
funny dance humor
Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!
daughter growing-up son
I'm old enough to remember when there were no black quarterbacks - there were no blacks on TV. I hope my son or daughter doesn't have to be as fixated on race as I am, because he or she will grow up in freer times.
funny humor pimp
Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.
fire mad fingertips
You can't be happy that fire cooks your food and be mad it burns your fingertips.
daughter jobs men
My relationship with my daughter is gonna affect her relationship with men for the rest of her life... Sometimes I'm walking with my daughter. I'm pushing her in the stroller, and sometimes I just pick her up and stare at her, and I realize, my only job in life is to keep her off the pole.