Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnikis an American comedian, television host, writer, producer, actor and podcast personality. He is known for his dark comedy style, which emphasizes misdirection, non sequiturs, biting insults, an arrogant demeanour, and a stage persona that frequently takes amoral stances...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth22 December 1978
CityPittsburgh, PA
CountryUnited States of America
sex years twelve
I have a twelve year old sex doll. Brand new.
laughing people toes
I guess I prefer the laughs. I couldn't do a whole set of just shocks, but I like throwing a fastball inside every now and then to keep people on their toes.
hands looks like-you
You look like you deep fry your hands before you bite your fingernails.
funny mom humor
My mom's been having a hard time lately. She just found out that she has to have both of her breasts removed - if she's ever going to be good at golf.
memories comedian members
An offended audience member repeating a comedian's act from memory is worse than, literally, anything.
drunk lasts towns
I love Austin, but last time I was in town for twelve hours. I was exhausted, drunk and miserable. But none of that was Austin's fault.
laughing people mind
I want people to just be paying attention even if they're not necessarily laughing at something, or if it takes them a while to get something, I don't mind that. If half the crowd gets the joke and the other half is sitting there scratching their heads, that's just as good for me if I like the joke, because I feel like it just brings people in more.
funny suicide humor
My great grandmother threw herself in front of a bus. The police tried to say she was committed suicide but the family knew she was just trying to stop civil rights.
alcohol drink born
I can drink like a fish, or at least, someone born with fetal alcohol syndrome.
dad father wish
Father's Day makes me wish I could talk to my Dad just one more time, instead of all the time.
girlfriend yelling trying
I'm trying to teach my girlfriend how to surf. But I just end up yelling at her the whole time. Because I don't know how to surf.
nice blow guy
I'm actually a really nice guy, once you get to blow me.
want dies
When I die, I want to be cremated with everybody.
nice thinking people
People are surprised that I'm nice and it helps me out a little bit; it's easy to be nice when everyone thinks you're going to be a jerk but if people think you're a nice guy then it's tough because it's what they expect.