Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer
Amy Beth Schumeris an American stand-up comedian, writer, actress, and producer. She is the creator, co-producer, co-writer and star of the sketch comedy series Inside Amy Schumer, which debuted on Comedy Central in 2013 and has received a Peabody Award. Schumer has been nominated for five Primetime Emmy Awards for her work on the series, winning for Outstanding Variety Sketch Series in 2015. That year, she also wrote and starred in the comedy film Trainwreck, receiving nominations for the Writers...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth1 June 1981
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
I want to quit. Not performing, but being a woman altogether. I want to throw my hands in the air, after reading a mean Twitter comment, and say, 'All right! You got it. You figured me out. I'm not pretty. I'm not thin. I do not deserve to use my voice. I'll start wearing a burqa and start waiting tables at a pancake house. All my self-worth is based on what you can see.' But then I think, F*** that ... I am a woman with thoughts and questions and s*** to say. I say if I'm beautiful. I say if I'm strong. You will not determine my story - I will.
Some street jokes are just timeless. There's an old street joke about comedians. The joke is that a beautiful girl comes up to a comedian at the end of the night and says, "I saw your show tonight, and I just loved it. I want to go home with you, and I'll do anything you want." And the comedian says, "Were you at the 7 or the 9?" That's just a perfect joke, because it points out how egomaniacal and obsessive comedians are. Even though I'm not waiting for a groupie, I can completely understand it. It just defines how comedians are driven.
I say if I'm beautiful. I say if I'm strong. You will not determine my story - I will.
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'
The truth is, whoever I've dated, if I've ever wanted to talk about them on stage, I've asked them first. And I've gotten their permission to tell a story or talk about them before I do it.
I don't feel any sense of competition at all, and that might be my naïveté, but I don't feel pitted against anyone at all.
I think of myself as a fairly attractive girl and always have, thanks to my mom. I was brought into this world thinking I was gorgeous because my mother was extremely devoted to this notion.
My background is in theater. I was a theater major in college.
I've always been really dark, and drawn to darker humor. Nothing has been forced, and I don't say anything for shock value.
I am a hot-blooded fire and I am fearless.
I think you can go from being not very funny to working really hard for 10 years and figuring out how to make a living on the road, but I don't think you can rise much above that.
I just say what I think is the funniest thing I could say. I'm not trying to make headlines. I'm just trying to say the stuff that I think is funny and will make people laugh.
I like to create stuff. I like to express myself through jokes.
Stand-up is not something that you're good at right away. You have to do it a ton. But, I think I got to shave a year off because I didn't have to get over stage fright.