Famous Quotes & Sayings

Anthony Jeselnik

I like to play pranks on my girlfriend, you know, keep things fresh for me, make me laugh, you know? She hates it. But like, the other night, I put Saran wrap over the toilet seat, you know, which doesn't sound that original, but she's bulimic.

Anthony Jeselnik

My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person... so I can get a better girlfriend.

Anthony Jeselnik

This past Christmas, I told my girlfriend for months in advance that all I wanted was an Xbox. That's it. Beginning and end of list, Xbox. You know what she got me? A homemade frame with a picture of us from our first date together. Which was fine. Because I got her an Xbox.

Anthony Jeselnik

My girlfriend was just killed in a car accident. Devastating. I can't believe I'm only going to have sex with her one more time.

Anthony Jeselnik

My girlfriend loves to eat chocolate. She's always eating chocolate, and she likes to joke she's got a chocolate addiction. Get me away from those Hersheys bars. I'm addicted to them. It's really annoying. So I put her in a car and I drove her downtown. And I pointed out a crack addict. And I said, Do you see that, honey?... Why can't you be that skinny?

Anthony Jeselnik

My ex-girlfriend owned a parakeet…oh my god, that f**king thing would never shut up. But the bird was cool.

Anthony Jeselnik

My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut. I don't understand why she's crying. I'm the one who has to get a new girlfriend.

Andrea Jung

I can only have dinner with my girlfriends once a month instead of once a week.

Adam Rapp

My work is always more emotional than I am. My characters say things to each other that I get accused of not being able to say to my girlfriend.

Adam Levine

I don't date my girlfriend because she's a model. I date her because I love her.

Adam Garcia

My favorite thing to do is to wind those guys up by hitting on their girlfriends. I say, 'I think your girlfriend's gorgeous, but it's all right, I'm gay.' They get very nervous after a few minutes!

Alex Pettyfer

I've really actually grown with my girlfriends and the people that they've introduced me to and the way that I've been welcomed in by their families. I'm a very, very lucky man.

Alex Pettyfer

I have never been in a situation thankfully where I haven't gotten along with my girlfriend's parents. I've been very lucky to have girlfriends that have had such amazing families that have brought me in.

A. J. McLean

Our fans want us to be happy and if that means being married or having a girlfriend, they are okay with that. Of course, in this industry it is a bit harder to have normal relationships, but it is possible.

Adrienne Bailon

I have definitely been in experiences where my girlfriends have outgrown me and that's ok and I think that I should be inspired by that to know that it's time to move on - it's time to evolve as well and I think that should be inspirational to other people. They shouldn't feel stifled and feel like oh we can't grow up, we can't move on - change is a good thing.

My girlfriend has a smaller car, if it wasn't for her I probably wouldn't be able to make it to school.

Jason Bateman

I only wanted to get married once, so when I felt I was ready to handle it, I looked at my relationships and noticed that boyfriends get tired of girlfriends, and vice versa, but you never get tired of your friends.

Joe Thomas

Men and women have different ideas of what constitutes tidiness. I tend to think it's about things being clean, but my mum and girlfriend are more about how things look.

Ben Gibbard

Everybody has a language or code that they use with their wife or their girlfriend or boyfriend or what have you. It's a language aside from the language they have with strangers. I've always been maybe an abuser of alliteration, but I've always loved it and I like how those words sound together.

Ben Gibbard

An ex-girlfriend once got upset when I told her that music is the most important thing in my life. It's more important than anyone else could ever be. I don't want to be overly dramatic and say it's the only thing that gets me up and keeps me going. But people in your life come and go. As you go through your life, you make friendships, you break friendships, you have relationships. Music is the one thing I've always been able to rely on.

Ben Folds

If I'm in a relationship and my girlfriend is sleeping with other people, I don't need to know who it is; I just want to know how she feels about it.

Candis Cayne

Growing up, me and my brother, we were kind of exact opposites. We were completely yin and yang. He was more rough and tumble, and I just wanted to play with my girlfriends.

Caprice Bourret

You know, I have guys that are almost stalkers... it is very strange. I had this one guy that e-mailed me off my site, and thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend. He then came to my house in London, I do not know how he found it.

Cameron Diaz

I know that in my life my girlfriends are one of the most important relationships I have going through the good times and the bad times.

Cameron Diaz

I think women are afraid to say that they don't want children because they're going to get shunned. But I think that's changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don't have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don't need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet.

Carson Daly

My girlfriend Siri is a food blogger, and we both love to entertain and eat. This is what happens when you're in your thirties: what was once a passion and real appetite for nightlife in New York City manifests itself into other things, like entertaining at home.

Carrot Top

It's weird, I never wish anything bad upon anybody, except two or three old girlfriends.

Alafair Burke

According to FBI statistics for 2008, only 22 percent of murder victims were killed by strangers. More than 30 percent were slain by family members, boyfriends, and girlfriends. Nearly half of all murders were committed by friends, neighbors, and casual acquaintances.

Breckin Meyer

My high school girlfriend would ask if I finally learned how to unbutton the back of a sweater!

Bruce McCulloch

I like to do little obsessed losers, or people who are in over their head, or people who are trying to figure stuff out, or guys whose girlfriends leave them and they don't quite get it. Guys who just don't quite get it.

Brittany Murphy

I ask a lot because I'm very curious - especially about ex-girlfriends. I'm pretty good at getting the answers, too.

Jack Nicholson

You only lie to two people in your life, your girlfriend and the police.

Albert Finney

My girlfriend and I rented a nice house on the river and I was there for about two and a half months, and we were just out of Alabama. I hardly got to see Alabama.