Related Quotes
funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature. Charles Dickens
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse. Charles Dickens
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions. Charles Dickens
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people. Charles Dickens
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home! Charles Dickens
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. Charles Dickens
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner. Charles Caleb Colton
funny age fifty
I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent. Charles Caleb Colton
hilarious military flower
If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when there WAS a military conflict, everybody involved would feel just awful and there would soon be a high-level exchange of notes written on greeting cards with flowers on the front, followed by a Peace Luncheon Dave Barry
hilarious loneliness being-alone
I don't want to be alone, I want to be left alone. Audrey Hepburn
hilarious husband giving
I am truly not one to give advice. I'm divorced and I stole my best friend's husband. Denise Richards
hilarious fun giving
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back. Bill Watterson
hilarious two cards
Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator. Daniel Handler
hilarious lying ifs
If you have something to say and say nothing, you are really telling a lie. Ashleigh Brilliant
hilarious looks unexpected
Look how often the unexpected happens - yet we still never expect it. Ashleigh Brilliant
hilarious believe fate
One possible reason that I don't believe in fate is that I wasn't fated to. Ashleigh Brilliant
hilarious since tall
Since he's so tall and so big it was hilarious to see him do it. Quintyn Eldridge
sarcastic thinking people
Their demeanor is invariably morose, sullen, clownish and repulsive. I should think there is not, on the face of the earth, a people so entirely destitute of humor, vivacity, or the capacity for enjoyment. Charles Dickens
sarcastic fall names
So boring you fall asleep halfway through her name. Alan Bennett
sarcastic giving mustache
Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache. Alan Bennett
sarcastic trying please
Please try not to be such a wiener-head. Dave Barry
sarcastic fitness sarcasm
The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremendous boredom. Dave Barry
sarcastic stars war
Since I started making films, I've been a nut for dialogue. When I first saw Star Wars when I was 12 years old, I came home and recited all of the lines from it. Before I talked about Death Stars exploding and Tie Fighters I was talking about how funny Princess Leia was and how sarcastic Han Solo was. So to me that's always the most important thing, and I love hearing great actors say great lines. Bryan Singer
sarcastic teacher children
I was very bored at school. I found it very easy and slow and grey. My teachers didn't really know how to handle me, because I was very sarcastic. I was over-confident, arrogant, a typical youngest child. I went through periods of withdrawing into myself and school psychologists tried to figure me out, work out why I didn't fit in. I found that irritating, too. Carlos Ruiz Zafon
sarcastic daughter dad
My daughter got me a 'World's Best Dad' mug. So we know she's sarcastic. Bob Odenkirk
sarcastic reading writing
A great many people now reading and writing would be better employed keeping rabbits. Edith Sitwell