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funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse.
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people.
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner. Charles Caleb Colton
funny age fifty
I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent.
sarcastic thinking people
Their demeanor is invariably morose, sullen, clownish and repulsive. I should think there is not, on the face of the earth, a people so entirely destitute of humor, vivacity, or the capacity for enjoyment.
sarcastic fall names
So boring you fall asleep halfway through her name. Alan Bennett
sarcastic giving mustache
Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache.
sarcastic trying please
Please try not to be such a wiener-head. Dave Barry
sarcastic fitness sarcasm
The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremendous boredom.
sarcastic stars war
Since I started making films, I've been a nut for dialogue. When I first saw Star Wars when I was 12 years old, I came home and recited all of the lines from it. Before I talked about Death Stars exploding and Tie Fighters I was talking about how funny Princess Leia was and how sarcastic Han Solo was. So to me that's always the most important thing, and I love hearing great actors say great lines. Bryan Singer
sarcastic teacher children
I was very bored at school. I found it very easy and slow and grey. My teachers didn't really know how to handle me, because I was very sarcastic. I was over-confident, arrogant, a typical youngest child. I went through periods of withdrawing into myself and school psychologists tried to figure me out, work out why I didn't fit in. I found that irritating, too. Carlos Ruiz Zafon
sarcastic daughter dad
My daughter got me a 'World's Best Dad' mug. So we know she's sarcastic. Bob Odenkirk
sarcastic reading writing
A great many people now reading and writing would be better employed keeping rabbits. Edith Sitwell
should-have brethren has-beens
Brethren, who are we that God should have been so good to us? Charles Spurgeon
should-have numbers church
Mr. Brown had thought of nothing but numbers. He should have known that the kingdom of God did not depend on large crowds. Our Lord Himself stressed the importance of fewness. Narrow is the way and few the number. To fill the Lord's holy temple with an idolatrous crowd clamoring for signs was a folly of everlasting consequence. Our Lord used the whip only once in His life - to drive the crowd away from His church. Chinua Achebe
should-have two three
My core belief is that if you're complaining about something for more than three minutes, two minutes ago you should have done something about it. Caitlin Moran
should-have hey douchebags
Oh, hey, maybe I should have mentioned that my friends are retarded douchebags. Bryan Lee O'Malley
should-have funny-money enough
Everyone should have enough money to get plastic surgery Beverly Johnson
should-have aging wonderful
Aging has a wonderful beauty and we should have respect for that. Eartha Kitt
should-have people dentist
We've got to let the people know that there is a necessity, it's not even an option, it's a necessity to have a chiropractor. As much as it is a necessity to have a dentist, if you have a dentist for the family, you should have your chiropractor for the family. Arnold Schwarzenegger
should-have people today
Today, many people take for granted the notion that people whose lives are going to be very heavily affected by public policies should have a say in how they are formulated and carried out. Barney Frank
should-have trying liberty
And now that the legislators and do-gooders have so futilely inflicted so many systems upon society, may they finally end where they should have begun: May they reject all systems, and try liberty; for liberty is an acknowledgment of faith in God and His works Frederic Bastiat