Famous Quotes & Sayings

Madhur Bhandarkar

I'm a terrific mimic, and you can feel my funny bone.

Stuart Freeman

We're in a funny space. Too much good news is not good news because the market worries about the Fed.

Luke Treadaway

This morning someone sent me a very funny photo of me holding their puppy. We have matching colour jackets.

Norm Feuti

When you think about it, a lot of people have worked at retail at some time in their lives. And even if you haven't, all of us have had funny or frustrating experiences in stores.

Steven Wright

I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

There's nothing that beats proving you're funny by making a funny thing, and right now there are huge outlets for that, with You Tube and all the other stuff online.

For years, Blockbuster Video has edited movies. Like The Bad Lieutenant, when he's masturbating while the girls in the car are doing the thing. I rented it from Blockbuster and sped to that scene, and it was gone. I called up Blockbuster, and I'm like, "I got an erection, and the scene's not there."

I was in a hotel room in Dallas, and I was jerking off so much and so sadly and pathetically, that the phone rang, and I thought it's them, they're complaining. ... "Sir, could you please stop?"

Charlie Chaplin

Quebec from the boat looked like the ramparts where Hamlet's ghost might have walked.

Charlie Chaplin

Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.

Charlie Chaplin

I remain just one thing, and one thing only, and that is a clown. It places me on a far higher plane than any politician.

Charles Caleb Colton

Expect not praise without envy until you are dead.

Charles Dickens

There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.

Charles Simmons

Good Humor is the best shield against the darts of satirical raillery

Alan Watts

The reason we want to go on and on is because we live in an impoverished present.

Alan Moore

Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Charles de Gaulle

One does not arrest Voltaire.

Charles Caleb Colton

That author, however, who has thought more than he has read, read more than he has written, and written more than he has published, if he does not command success, has at least deserved it.

Charles Spurgeon

If your faith does not make you pray, have nothing to do with it; get rid of it, and God help thee to begin again.

Charles Spurgeon

If it does not glorify Christ, let it not console or please you.

Aiden Wilson Tozer

I do not know why God does some things, but I am convinced that nothing is accidental in his universe.

Aiden Wilson Tozer

Holy is the way God is. To be holy He does not conform to a standard. He IS that standard.

Aiden Wilson Tozer

God does not love us because we are hard or easy to love, He loves us because He is God.

Chris Bohjalian

But history does matter. There is a line connecting the Armenians and the Jews and the Cambodians and the Bosnians and the Rwandans. There are obviously more, but, really, how much genocide can one sentence handle?

Chris Alexander

Absence of failure does not constitute success.