Mark Twain

Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
hands knives civilization
It is yet another Civilized Power, with its banner of the Prince of Peace in one hand and its loot-basket and its butcher-knife in the other. Is there no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level?.
girl knives want
I don't want my girl to be so skinny she can knife me with her knee.
book knives editors
This editor is a critic. He has pulled out his carving-knife and his tomahawk and is starting after a book which he is going to have for breakfast.
knives perfect teeth
Even the clearest and most perfect circumstantial evidence is likely to be at fault, after all, and therefore ought to be received with great caution. Take the case of any pencil, sharpened by any woman; if you have witnesses, you will find she did it with a knife; but if you take simply the aspect of the pencil, you will say that she did it with her teeth.
learning trouble wages
What's the use you learning to do right, when it's troublesome to do right and ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same?
against dog home mama pack time trunk turns wife
When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home to mama
convict conviction known man people settled
When a man is known to have no settled convictions of his own he can't convict other people
advertises brings fig leaf modesty statue suspicion
The statue that advertises its modesty with a fig leaf really brings its modesty under suspicion
christian nations spite
The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive, but in spite of their religion, not because of it
editor excellent meddle needs perfect political serve shall term
I shall not often meddle with politics, because we have a political Editor who is already excellent and only needs to serve a term or two in the penitentiary to be perfect
generalize sample single stop
The world will not stop and think- it never does, it is not its way; its way is to generalize from a single sample
building hold insane people run sane shut tried
The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we would run out of building materials.
building hold humanity insane materials people run sane shut tried
The way it is now, the asylums can hold all the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials
fluid history ink merely prejudice written
The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice