Jimmy Carr
Jimmy Carr
James Anthony Patrick "Jimmy" Carris an English stand-up comedian, television host and actor, known for his signature laugh, deadpan delivery, dark humour, and use of edgy one-liners. He is also a writer, actor, and presenter of radio and television. Carr moved to a career in comedy in 2000 and has become a successful comedian. After becoming established as a stand-up comedian, Carr began to appear in a number of Channel 4 television shows, becoming the host of the panel show...
NationalityEnglish
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth15 September 1972
I've got a friend whose nickname is "Shagger". You might think that's pretty cool. She doesn't like it.
My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen.
A big girl once came up to me after a show and said "I think you're fatist." I said "No, no. I think you're fattest."
Jesus loves you... He's not 'in love' with you.
I saw a charity appeal in the Guardian the other day, and it read "Little Zuki has to walk 13 miles a day just to fetch water". And I couldn't help thinking, she should move.
If we're all God's children, what's so special about Jesus?
Cats have nine lives. Makes them ideal for experimentation.
Once I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.
I live near a remedial school. There is a sign that says, slow... children. That can't be good for their self esteem. But look of course on the positive side, they can't read it.
I was out with a friend and he came over with a pair of girls. I said to him "They're like buses." He said "What? Because you wait for ages and then two come along at once." I said "No, they are like buses!"
It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
In Pizza Express you can get garlic bread with cheese and tomato. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but that's a pizza.
No matter how much you give a homeless person for tea... you never get that tea.
I did a gig in the U.S. once for the homeless. I said 'It's nice to see so many bums on seats.'