Craig Ferguson
Craig Ferguson
Craig Fergusonis a Scottish-American television host, stand-up comedian, writer, actor, director, producer and voice artist. He is the host of the syndicated game show Celebrity Name Game, and the host of Join or Die with Craig Ferguson on History. He was also the host of The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, an Emmy Award-nominated, Peabody Award-winning late-night talk show that aired on CBS from 2005 to 2014...
NationalityScottish
ProfessionTV Show Host
Date of Birth17 May 1962
CitySpringburn, Scotland
I always wanted to make motion pictures, ever since I was a wee boy, and I was 32, and time was marching on. I met a guy who said, 'Come out to Hollywood for 10 days, and I'll get you a deal.' So I figured, 'OK, 10 days.' On the 10th day, he got me a development deal with Disney, not for a lot of money, but it allowed me to make the move.
Occasionally, when I lived in London, I would have sex with a girl from an aristocratic family. I always enjoyed doing to them what their ancestors did to my country.
My son's always showing me pictures of dinosaurs and asking me what their names are. I dont know so I make stuff up: That son is a thesaurus.
If you absolutely believe that what you do is right, you're bullet-proof.
Here's a tip for all you aspiring young comics: Don't beat up the customers. It is very difficult to get laughs from an audience when you've actually drawn blood from one of their number. It kills the mood.
I was 15 years old when I was in this band; we were called Stag. We used to wear spandex pants and no underwear - we looked like marbles smugglers.
Al Qaeda has declared war on the Somali pirates. That is awesome! Evil against evil. Like Alien versus Predator or Cheney versus his lawyer.
From 1934 to 1963, the biggest criminals in America ended up on Alcatraz. Nowadays they end up on Wall Street.
In Los Angeles on Black Friday, a woman pepper sprayed Wal-Mart shoppers who tried to cut in line. The police acted fast by immediately hiring her to get rid of peaceful protesters outside banking institutions all across the United States.
The difference between a broadcaster and a host is that a host tells stories and dumb jokes, but a broadcaster can articulate deeper like, you know - things and stuff.
According to a new study, our email is not as safe as we thought. How do they know this? They've been reading my email.
I'm hooked on email. That's right, kids, I'm one of you.
Here in California, we passed a law against texting while driving. But there's no law preventing you from writing a letter while driving.
They've found a link between chemicals in shampoo and obesity. If you're eating shampoo, your weight is the least of your concerns.