Chris Rock
Chris Rock
Christopher Julius "Chris" Rock III is an American comedian, actor, and producer...
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth7 February 1965
CityAndrews, SC
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You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?
men causes needs
Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense.
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When I do stand-up, I'm basically doing a one-man show.
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Shaq is rich. The white man who signs his check ... is wealthy. "Ah, here you go, Shaq. Go buy yourself a bouncing car. Bling, bling!"
men unfaithful
Men are only as unfaithful as their options.
men boys comedy
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.
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If you see a black woman with an overweight white man, you know she got effed up credit!
funny gun men
White man makes guns? No problem. Black rapper says "gun"? Congressional hearing.
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Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.
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There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I get to have kids. I get to be sexual. I get to grow. I get to be a man.
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Only black people in the whole neighborhood, so let's break it down: Me, I'm a decent comedian, I'm a'ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the white man that lives next door to me does for a living? He's a f*****g dentist.
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Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church, you better be into church. Your man or woman a crack head, you better be a crack head ... Otherwise it just won't work.
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Men do not settle down. Men surrender.
lying men lying-men
Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.