Chris Rock
Chris Rock
Christopher Julius "Chris" Rock III is an American comedian, actor, and producer...
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth7 February 1965
CityAndrews, SC
black invented man rock school stolen
Much like rock 'n' roll, school shootings were invented by the black man and stolen by the whites,
almost car chris drive flash love man nice people pull
Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know? People are nice to ya, they give you the beneift o' the doubt... You drive a flash car down the freeway and the cops'll pull y'over and before they even look they like 'What the f**k are you doing?' and then they see it's you and they like 'Awww man, it's Chris Rock, it's okay, man we thought you was a nigga'.
men shows one-man
When I do stand-up, I'm basically doing a one-man show.
men white-man black
If you see a black woman with an overweight white man, you know she got effed up credit!
men white-man black
See, the Black man gotta fly to get to something the white man can walk to.
zebras men white-man
Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
bill bunch comics far funny george good guy joan quality richard rodney
Show me one guy or woman as funny as Rodney Dangerfield or as good as George Carlin, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, or Joan Rivers. There are a lot of good comics out there, no doubt, but as far as the quality of the comics goes, I think what you have is a bunch of situational comics.
slightly
I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack. That should be the name of my new DVD: 'Chris Rock: Slightly Above Hack'.
hang pick school time watch
I used to hang out with grandfather all the time because he used to pick me up from school sometimes, or drive me to my mother's, so I'd be with my grandfather a lot. I used to watch him write his sermons.
dark demons
I have my own demons and dark moods. It's weird.
good jokes people singers sting written
Jokes rot. They're not like songs. I always envy singers - Sting is always going to sing 'Roxanne'. But people want to hear new jokes. I've written jokes as good as 'Roxanne', I believe. But I can't tell them again.
abandoned buildings came crack eddie everybody ghetto grew hotels household la lived looked loving middle murphy saw stayed until worst york
I grew up in a very loving two-parent household in the middle of one of the worst ghettos in New York City, ... I didn't know I lived in the ghetto until I was like 20, 19. I came to LA with Eddie Murphy and stayed at hotels and all this stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared. I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and had crack heads.
mile plots
I (could) see these plots a mile away. And I was 7.
bought grand taxes year
My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars. And I bought a red Corvette for $45,000 dollars. I'm thinking, 'I've got 45 grand left!' Taxes didn't even come into my equation. At the end of the first year of making 90 grand I was 25, 30 in the hole. We live in this baller, spend-money culture.