Famous Quotes & Sayings

Steven Wright

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

Steven Wright

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Steven Wright

I forgot and left the lighthouse on all night. Next day the sun wouldn't rise.

Steven Wright

Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?

Steven Wright

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

Steven Wright

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.

Steven Wright

I saw a man with a wooden leg and a real foot.

Steven Wright

What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?

Steven Wright

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Steven Wright

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don’t know how I got there.

Steven Wright

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

Steven Wright

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

Steven Wright

I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

Steven Wright

I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.

Steven Wright

I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

Steven Wright

I like to reminisce with people I don't know.

Steven Wright

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

Steven Wright

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Steven Wright

I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'

Steven Wright

They say you're not supposed to put metal in a microwave oven. They're right.

Steven Wright

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

Steven Wright

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

Steven T. Katz

Something fundamental about the myth of the Jew has resurfaced.

Steven Strait

Whats fun for me is to try new things and push myself and not get stuck in one genre or another, or stuck with one character or another.

Steven R. McQueen

I would love to maybe shoot a movie or something, but end goals: I just want to play a superhero. I think that would be so much fun. I'm putting that energy into the universe for sure.

Steven R. McQueen

It's always fun having Matt Davis on set. I definitely miss having him around, for sure.

Steven R. McQueen

My step-dad started playing hockey in Detroit so we moved and I had to start home school. I started watching movies since I had a bunch of free time and then I was like, 'You know what? I want to give this a shot, move back to L.A., and audition.' The first show I booked was a show called Threshold with Carla Gugino and it was obviously a terrifying experience and I felt out of my comfort zone, but it made me want to keep going because it was fun.

Steven Soderbergh

I never leave the writer behind, because you rewrite the movie in post, or at least I do. I always do, and I feel like anybody who doesn't at least explore that possibility is short-changing themselves. Editing is the most fun and most exciting part of the process.

Steven Soderbergh

I had more fun making Traffic than either of the Ocean's films.

Steven Soderbergh

A real explosion is not only much more fun to shoot, it also helps the actors and creates an energy on set and ultimately in the scene.

Steven Soderbergh

Making a film that's supposed to be fun to watch is really hard - that's the weird irony of it.

Richard Chamberlain

Over a long period of time, living as if you were someone else is no fun.

Reggie Evans

I don't know what's wrong with that girl.