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funny girl humor
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. Charlie Chaplin
funny jesus humorous
I have no further use for America. I wouldn't go back there if Jesus Christ was President. Charlie Chaplin
funny friendship humor
To help a friend in need is easy, but to give him your time is not always opportune. Charlie Chaplin
funny good-morning laughter
A day without laughter is a day wasted. Charlie Chaplin
funny life courage
Life can be wonderful if you're not afraid of it. All it takes is courage, imagination ... and a little dough Charlie Chaplin
funny science weather
Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. Charles Dudley Warner
funny artist canvas
A great artist can paint a great picture on a small canvas. Charles Dudley Warner
funny travel air
I wouldn't mind dying for France, but not for Air France. Charles de Gaulle
funny humor church
Hearing Mass is the ceremony I most favor during my travels. Church is the only place where someone speaks to me and I do not have to answer back. Charles de Gaulle
witty humorous idiot
What do you take me for, an idiot? Charles de Gaulle
witty profound sublime
Shakespeare, Butler and Bacon have rendered it extremely difficult for all who come after them to be sublime, witty or profound. Charles Caleb Colton
witty expression order
Euphonic and harmonious expressions, forcible and just expressions, profound and comprehensive expressions, and especially apt and witty expressions, each have their specific influence upon different minds, and their common influence upon all minds.... It is therefore high time our most valuable aphorisms and paragraphs were put in order for frequent perusal, and for handy reference, as the circumstances of life call up subjects. Charles Simmons
witty memories kids
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry
witty stupid party
What I think is that the F-word is basically just a convenient nasty-sounding word that we tend to use when we would really like to come up with a terrific-ally witty insult, the kind Winston Churchill always came up with when enormous women asked him stupid questions at parties. Dave Barry
witty time compelling-reason
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. Dave Barry
witty technology promise
I will vote for the first candidate who promises to use nuclear missiles against LinkedIn. Dave Barry
witty powerful reality
Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators. Dave Barry
witty sex teenage
It's very witty and it's great to see teenage characters have control that way. And you can actually hear about sex and pot and it's okay, it's not completely bad and you can't say that to teenagers. Caroline Dhavernas
inspiration ideas desire
I have found that great ideas come when you have a great desire to have them. Charlie Chaplin
inspirational motivational success
Even when I was in the orphanage, when I was roaming the street trying to find enough to eat, even then I thought of myself as the greatest actor in the world. I had to feel the exuberance that comes from utter confidence in yourself. Without it, you go down to defeat. Charlie Chaplin
inspirational mean imagination
Imagination means nothing without doing. Charlie Chaplin
inspirational character men
A man's true character comes out when he's drunk. Charlie Chaplin
inspirational happiness pain
To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it! Charlie Chaplin
inspirational relationship bullying
My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain. Charlie Chaplin
inspirational patient disability
Strokes are preventable and treatable. Prompt treatment of patients experiencing stroke saves lives and reduces disability. Charles W. Pickering
inspirational life speech
There is but one pleasure in life equal to that of being called on to make an after-dinner speech, and that is not being called on to make one. Charles Dudley Warner
inspirational funny thinking
When I want to know what France thinks, I ask myself. Charles de Gaulle