Related Quotes
funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature. Charles Dickens
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse. Charles Dickens
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions. Charles Dickens
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people. Charles Dickens
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home! Charles Dickens
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. Charles Dickens
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner. Charles Caleb Colton
funny age fifty
I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent. Charles Caleb Colton
witty profound sublime
Shakespeare, Butler and Bacon have rendered it extremely difficult for all who come after them to be sublime, witty or profound. Charles Caleb Colton
witty expression order
Euphonic and harmonious expressions, forcible and just expressions, profound and comprehensive expressions, and especially apt and witty expressions, each have their specific influence upon different minds, and their common influence upon all minds.... It is therefore high time our most valuable aphorisms and paragraphs were put in order for frequent perusal, and for handy reference, as the circumstances of life call up subjects. Charles Simmons
witty memories kids
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry
witty stupid party
What I think is that the F-word is basically just a convenient nasty-sounding word that we tend to use when we would really like to come up with a terrific-ally witty insult, the kind Winston Churchill always came up with when enormous women asked him stupid questions at parties. Dave Barry
witty time compelling-reason
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. Dave Barry
witty technology promise
I will vote for the first candidate who promises to use nuclear missiles against LinkedIn. Dave Barry
witty powerful reality
Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators. Dave Barry
witty sex teenage
It's very witty and it's great to see teenage characters have control that way. And you can actually hear about sex and pot and it's okay, it's not completely bad and you can't say that to teenagers. Caroline Dhavernas
witty tongue wit
Your wits make others witty. Catherine the Great
sorry rain heart
Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts. I was better after I had cried, than before--more sorry, more aware of my own ingratitude, more gentle. Charles Dickens
sorry pie im-sorry
Then I'm sorry to say, I've eat your pie. Charles Dickens
sorry oxygen gone
Unfortunately it's also true to say that good management is a bit like oxygen - it's invisible and you don't notice its presence until it's gone, and then you're sorry. Charles Stross
sorry low-self-esteem im-sorry
I'm sorry to myself, for treating me worse than I would anybody else. Alanis Morissette
sorry parent effort
I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. Alan Chambers
sorry fun phones
People still call me ma’am on the phone, and it’s just part of life now. I’m not even phased by it… Going through DriveThrus is always fun, because it’s always so shocking when they see me. It’d just be kind of like, ‘Thank you ma… woah!! Woah, sorry about that!’ Chris Colfer
sorry school high-school
There's nothing wrong with you. There's a lot wrong with the world you live in. And definitely get out of high school and make everyone sorry. Chris Colfer
sorry should-have people
When you're exonerated, then the people who wrongly accused you should have the guts to stand up and say, "I'm sorry." Chris Christie
sorry hard-days hard
There were hard days but I never felt sorry for myself. Chris Bosh