Related Quotes
funny people wondered
People have often wondered how they'd feel if they were adopted. I think it's funny. Larry David
funny mankind maybe mystery order separate understand word words
Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words mank and ind. What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind. 
funny half opening written year
Mel has written 10 new songs, and they're very funny. It's a year and a half away from opening on Broadway. Susan Stroman
funny heart people
The funny thing about me that most people never really understand is that, at heart, I'm really a jock. Billy Corgan
funny teamwork football
A football team is like a piano. You need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing. Bill Shankly
funny golf hockey
He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot." Bill Engvall
funny girl home
My son is 12 now, and is really getting into girls. A lot. But the thing about twelve year old boys is that they don't possess what I like to call that ... discretionary gene yet. We were walking home from the ballfield the other day and there was a woman walking towards us who was ... gifted. I saw them, and I saw him see them. But she was too close for me to go, "Dude, shut up." She hadn't walked two feet behind us and he goes "God dang, did you see the SIZE of those things?" And all I could say was "Yeah, I did!"
funny uncles humor
No parents. You have Uncle Jesse, forever in overalls. Then there's Bo and Duke. What do they do? I never saw them working for food or gas money. You can only kill so many possum.
funny humor vacation
I thought "RV" stood for "Recreational Vehicle." No! It stands for "Ruins Vacations."
sarcastic fake-people sarcasm
You can't find any true closeness in Hollywood, because everybody does the fake closeness so well. Carrie Fisher
sarcastic women humor
Instant gratification takes too long.
sarcastic fitness sarcasm
Muscles come and go; flab lasts. Bill Vaughan
sarcastic fun thinking
Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car. Bill Bryson
sarcastic looks being-sarcastic
Aw, now look at that, you're being sarcastic, aren't you? Carl Jung
sarcastic men common-sense
He was one of those men who possess almost every gift, except the gift of the power to use them. Charles Kingsley
sarcastic song humor
In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming. Alanis Morissette
sarcastic sorry mean
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you're sorry. Charles Osgood
sarcastic sophisticated egotistical
A sophisticated rhetorician, inebriated with the exuberance of his own verbosity. Benjamin Disraeli
heaven myth night peace
Peace is always beautiful, The myth of heaven indicates peace and night Walt Whitman
heaven want wanting-to-die
Everybody wants to go to Heaven, but no one wants to die to get there! B. B. King
heaven hell display
Heaven will display far more variety than Hell. C. S. Lewis
heaven soul desire
Heaven offers nothing that a mercenary soul can desire.
heaven may ifs
There may be a heaven, but if Joan Crawford is there, I'm not going. Bette Davis
heaven glimpse courageous
The human spirit is not indestructible; but a courageous few discover that, when in hell, they are granted a glimpse of heaven. Anthony Storr
heaven way pity
What a pity that the only way to heaven is in a hearse.
heaven going-to-heaven christianity
Something larger is happening than just going to heaven.
heaven way hardest
Do not ask God the way to heaven; He will show you the hardest way.