Famous Quotes & Sayings

Peter Jennings

Always have a sense of humor about life - you'll need it - but always be courteous to boot.

Robert Mankoff

The interesting thing about humor is that in humor, you - in logic, something is A or not A. In humor, it's both A and not A.

Mallory Ortberg

Humor is always more interesting when it comes from someone who's had more than, like, five experiences.

John Scalzi

Many of the writers who have inspired me most are outside the genre: Humorists like Robert Benchley and James Thurber, screenwriters like Ben Hecht and William Goldman, and journalists/columnists like H.L. Mencken, Mike Royko and Molly Ivins.

Diane Keaton

Humor helps us get through life with a modicum of grace. It offers one of the few benign ways of coping with the absurdity of it all.

Dennis Ritchie

The notion of a record is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card.

Edsger Dijkstra

PL/1, the fatal disease, belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set.

Carlos Ponce

I can't live without a sense of humor. I need to be laughing and entertained at all times.

Eddie Vedder

Caffeine. The gateway drug.

David Macdonald

No one has any idea where they are getting their numbers from.

Diane Glossman

Morgan's numbers were outstanding. It was all trading.

Ben Edwards

Numbers can give you a ... sense of the organization, but they can't give you the whole sense,

Charles Osgood

That's a number that in broadcasting is unimaginable.

Dennis Ritchie

The number of UNIX installations has grown to 10, with more expected...

Dennis Prager

The evidence in this universe for design - or, if you will, the fine-tuning that cannot be explained by chance or by 'enough time' - is so compelling that the only way around it is to suggest that our universe is only one of an infinite number of universes.

Ehud Olmert

The formula for the parameters of a unilateral solution are: To maximize the number of Jews; to minimize the number of Palestinians; not to withdraw to the 1967 border and not to divide Jerusalem.

Edvard Munch

Any number of holier-than-thou honorable realists walk around in the belief that they have accomplished something, simply because they tell you for the hundredth time that a field is green and a red-painted house is painted red.

Deval Patrick

I can't get those numbers to work, Tom.

Dan Buenning

Maybe we're just too dumb to know we shouldn't be doing this. And we really don't care.

Turkish Proverb

If a man would live in peace he should be blind, deaf, and dumb

John Kosmina

When you concede dumb goals, you've usually got to pay a price.

Jerry Coleman

I don't feel quite as dumb as they make me look,

Clint Eastwood

A lot of dumb pictures have made a lot of money, but that doesn't mean they're going to be anything cinema students will revel over in the future.

Walter Benjamin

If you're deaf, dumb, and blind to what's happening in the world, you're under no obligation to do anything. But if you know what's happening and you don't do anything but sit on your ass, then you're nothing but a punk

Charles Dickens

Thus, cases of injustice, and oppression, and tyranny, and the most extravagant bigotry, are in constant occurrence among us every day. It is the custom to trumpet forth much wonder and astonishment at the chief actors therein setting at defiance so completely the opinion of the world; but there is no greater fallacy; it is precisely because they do consult the opinion of their own little world that such things take place at all, and strike the great world dumb with amazement.

Ed Schultz

If I lived in Massachusetts, I'd try to vote ten times ... Yeah that's right, I'd cheat to keep these bastards out. I would. Because that's exactly what they are.

Charlaine Harris

It was one of God's jokes that such a dumb mind had been put in such an eloquent body.