Related Quotes
funny pain philosophy
I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. Carol Leifer
funny men humans
It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon. Carol Leifer
funny waiting almost-done
Ask her to wait a moment I am almost done. Carl Friedrich Gauss
funny patience humor
Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. Agnes Repplier
funny women humor
Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. Agnes Repplier
funny sarcastic war
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. Abba Eban
funny marriage witty
Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens? Alan King
funny-inspirational integrity technology
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves. Alan Kay
funny girl humor
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. Charlie Chaplin
dog morning people
You know what kills me about Jennifer Lopez? The fact that this woman wakes up one day and she's like, 'You know what? From now on, I'd like people to call me J-Lo,' and then they do it. Only a celebrity can get away with this. George Bush doesn't come out for his morning press conferences: 'From now on, I'd like to be referred to as G-Bu. Y'all know my vice president, Dog Chain. Carol Leifer
dog tired ego
The ego is like a tired old dog. We can never kill it, so put it out on the back porch, let it rest there, and step around it. Carlos Castaneda
dog cat affection
Once when I had remarked on the affection quite often found between cat and dog, my friend replied, "Yes. But I bet no dog would ever confess it to the other dogs. C. S. Lewis
dogs humans problems
We have never really had any problems that I know of. Occasionally there are little scuffles -- between dogs or humans -- but nothing serious. Holly Swoape
dog pugs
I have one pug and one Czechoslovakian dog called Prazsky krysarik. Agnetha Faltskog
dog cat men
A man who owns a dog is, in every sense of the words, its master; the term expresses accurately their mutual relations. But it is ridiculous when applied to the limited possession of a cat. Agnes Repplier
dog distance cat
whereas the dog strives to lessen the distance between himself and man, seeks ever to be intelligent and intelligible, and translates into looks and actions the words he cannot speak, the cat dwells within the circle of her own secret thoughts. Agnes Repplier
dog heart cat
The dog is guided by kindly instinct to the man or woman whose heart is open to his advances. The cat often leaves the friend who courts her, to honor, or to harass, the unfortunate mortal who shudders at her unwelcome caresses. Agnes Repplier
dog common-sense puppy
A puppy is but a dog, plus high spirits, and minus common sense. Agnes Repplier
toilets politics way
I was lookin' high an' low for them Reds everywhere, I was lookin' in the sink an' underneath the chair. I looked way up my chimney hole, I even looked deep inside my toilet bowl. Bob Dylan
toilets reason process
The only process you've mastered is the process of elimination, and the only reason you've mastered that is because you can do it in the toilet. Orson Scott Card
toilets dentist miniatures
And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl. Bill Cosby
toilets hush-hush minutes
She cleans a toilet inside and out under a minute. More like terrifying Becca Fitzpatrick
toilets toilet-seat opening
I will go to the Opening of Anything, including a Toilet Seat Andy Warhol
toilets care ashes
You can flush my ashes down the toilet, for all I care. Carolyn Heilbrun
toilets cups bones
It's the mortal cup Jace, not the mortal toilet bowl. Cassandra Clare
toilets cleaning demeaning
I'd find it demeaning to be cleaning toilets. Jack Kevorkian
toilets bathroom made
The chili I ate made for an explosive bathroom experience. I don't know how to put this delicately, but I missed the toilet entirely. Seth Green