Famous Quotes & Sayings

Charles Caleb Colton

Expect not praise without envy until you are dead.

Charles Dickens

There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.

Charles Simmons

Good Humor is the best shield against the darts of satirical raillery

Alan Watts

The reason we want to go on and on is because we live in an impoverished present.

Alan Moore

Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

David Sedaris

If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?

Roman Gutierrez

We still saw some of our inexperience today. That will be the case, but there were still some steps of improvement.

Bo Burnham

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

Audrey Meadows

Fans always ask, What did the bedroom look like? All they ever saw was Alice or Ralph going in and out.

Arnold Bennett

Saw Washington Monument. Phallic. Appalling. A national catastrophe.

Deborah Harkness

You do angry. I just saw it. And you left at least one hole in my carpet to prove it.

Dennis Hopper

I wanted to be an actor. I decided when I was very young, when I first saw movies, that I wanted to be an actor.

Bill Murray

If you walk up to some random person on the street, grab them by the shoulder, and say 'Did you just see what I saw?!', you'll find that no-one wants to talk to you.

Carol Leifer

There were very few women comics when I started out doing stand-up. But I always saw that as a great advantage.

Chris Cooper

It's not the size of the hard drive that counts, it's how you download it.

Bill Johnson

Sometimes our breakthrough begins when we refuse to be impressed with the size of our problem.

Dick Cavett

I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn't include someone the size of the Hindenburg.

Edwin Moses

I overcame size with mechanics.

Chan Gailey

Size is definitely relative. If you're bigger, they can see you easier.

Delta Burke

Eve wasn't a size 6 and neither am I.

Jane Goodall

Mainly because as women's education increases all around the planet, we find that family size tends to drop.

Ashleigh Brilliant

Never underestimate the size and scope of my problems.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Bodybuilders' cocks are the same size as everyone else's.

David Allen

Things rarely get stuck because of lack of time. They get stuck because the doing of them has not been defined.

Tom Renney

We stuck with it. Definitely, we had to compete.

Shirley Manson

There's nothing I've done that I feel a lot of regret over because I stuck to my guns, even when it got uncomfortable - and it will get uncomfortable because you're going up against the wall.

Phil Garner

No, ... He snow-coned it. Stuck to the top of his glove.

Alan Lightman

Each person who gets stuck in time gets stuck alone.

Dave Eggers

I'll always be working on five things at once, usually with those documents open at the same time because if I get stuck somewhere I'll jump over to something else. That's how my head has always worked.

Anthony Nelson

First half, it was back and forth. They are a tough team, but we stuck in there.

Mike McCabe

There have been spotty things here and there. It's a surprise that we stuck it all together.

Leon Johnson

Our spinners bowled well as they stuck to the task and bowled well to their fields.

Bruno Tonioli

I like to read about subjects unrelated to my work, especially history.

Barry White

Everyone to me has to pick a subject to talk about in music if you're going to be a writer.

Elizabeth Bowen

Writers do not find subjects; subjects find them.

Nigel Barker

If I am to judge others, I should be subject to be judged. You make your bed, you must lie in it.

Garry Wills

I don't really write for an audience. I just write what the subject seems to me to require.

Gin Wigmore

I remember when I wrote songs when I was about 16, they all sounded the same because I didn't know anything. And all the subject matter was all the same because I hadn't actually done much.

Robert Luskin

Mr. Rove is still a subject of the investigation.

Robert Bennett

I am subject to expulsion if I divulge anything that is going on.

Joe Solmonese

I don't think it has anything to do with the subject matter.

Chiwetel Ejiofor

I'm constantly looking to see whether I look the same as I did earlier, whether I've put on or lost any weight.

Cathy Guisewite

This is a business meal. The calories do not count. I am mentally labeling these as 'business calories' so my body will know they were eaten in the line of duty and will process them differently.

Cathy Guisewite

Wake me up when I'm a size 5.

Ed Koch

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it.

Edwin Hubbel Chapin

In the matter of faith, we have the added weight of hope to that of reason in the convictions which we sustain relating to a future state.

Cass McCombs

Opinions only carry weight in the second or third person.

Cat Deeley

I don't feel any pressure to lose weight - and in any case, if I didn't have my food I'd be a nasty piece of work and wouldn't be able to function.

Carre Otis

My weight fluctuated when I was 30, and I did the unthinkable - I stepped out as a plus-sized model.

Chanel Iman

I drink a lot of protein shakes and do a lot of weight lifting.