Tom Lehrer
Tom Lehrer
Thomas Andrew "Tom" Lehreris an American singer-songwriter, satirist, pianist, and mathematician. He has lectured on mathematics and musical theater. He is best known for the pithy, humorous songs he recorded in the 1950s and '60s...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionSongwriter
Date of Birth9 April 1928
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
two eight three
From the three, you then use one to make eight ones. You add those ones to the three, and you get one-three base eight, or, in other words, In base ten you have eleven, and you take away seven. And seven from eleven is four. Now go back to the sixty-fours, you're left with two.
temperament performers
I wasn't really a performer by temperament,
hate apples pie
The poor folks hate the rich folks, and the rich folks hate the poor folks. All of my folks hate all of your folks, it's American as apple pie.
marine doubt politics
They love us everywhere we go. So when in doubt, send the Marines.
bombs politics shepherds
The Lord's our shepherd, says the psalm. But just in case, we better get a bomb.
atheist thinking arrogant
No one is more dangerous than someone who thinks he has The Truth. To be an atheist is almost as arrogant as to be a fundamentalist. But then again, I can get pretty arrogant.
want puppeteer
I don't want to satirise George Bush and his puppeteers, I want to vaporise them.
book dirty men
All books can be indecent books, though recent books are bolder. For filth, I'm glad to say, is in the mind of the beholder. When correctly viewed, everything is lewd. I could tell you things about Peter Pan and the Wizard of OZ, there's a dirty old man!
nice moral manners
Don't solicit for your sister, it's not nice. Unless you get a good percentage of her price.
wall writing naughty
Don't write naughty words on the wall if you can't spell!
commitment squares two
If I can't get people to commit themselves on whether or not there is a square root of two, then I won't touch on God or anything here
funny military army
The Army has carried the American ... ideal to its logical conclusion. Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and color, but also on ability.
people
People are stupider than anybody.
preaching audience
The audience usually has to be with you, I'm afraid. I always regarded myself as not even preaching to the converted, I was titillating the converted.