Mark Twain

Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
sex young young-ladies
In German, a young lady has no sex, but a turnip has
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Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
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The law of God, as quite plainly expressed in woman's construction, is this: There shall be no limit put upon your intercourse with the other sex sexually, at any time of life. During twenty-three days in every month (in the absence of pregnancy) from the time a woman is seven years old till she dies of old age, she is ready for action, and competent. As competent as the candlestick is to receive the candle. Competent every day, competent every night. Also, she wants that candle -- yearns for it, longs for it, hankers after it, as commanded by the law of God in her heart.
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Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.
sex good-sex female
There is only one good sex. The female one.
learning trouble wages
What's the use you learning to do right, when it's troublesome to do right and ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same?
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When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home to mama
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When a man is known to have no settled convictions of his own he can't convict other people
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The statue that advertises its modesty with a fig leaf really brings its modesty under suspicion
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The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive, but in spite of their religion, not because of it
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I shall not often meddle with politics, because we have a political Editor who is already excellent and only needs to serve a term or two in the penitentiary to be perfect
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The world will not stop and think- it never does, it is not its way; its way is to generalize from a single sample
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The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we would run out of building materials.
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The way it is now, the asylums can hold all the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials