Mark Twain
Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
america benevolent buried burned destroyed dozens exile furnished god heartbreak millions mine name orphans phrase pious remaining thousands turned widows
We have pacified some thousands of the islanders and buried them; destroyed their fields; burned their villages, and turned their widows and orphans out-of-doors; furnished heartbreak by exile to some dozens of disagreeable patriots; subjugated the remaining 10 millions by Benevolent Assimilation, which is the pious new name of the musket. And so, by these Providences of God -- and the phrase is the government's, not mine -- we are a World Power.
fortune freedom god three wisdom
It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
american-author creature god man work
Man - a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
character god good hands lovable man puts
God puts something good and something lovable in every man His hands create.
creation god good hand heart noble
God has put somrthing noble and good into every heart His hand created.
astonish created fair glorious god start
But we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and we glorious Americans will occasionally astonish the God that created us when we get a fair start
god christian army
The Church worked hard at it night and day during nine centuries and imprisoned, tortured, hanged, and burned whole hordes and armies of witches, and washed the Christian world clean with their foul blood. Then it was discovered that there was no such thing as witches, and never had been. One doesn't know whether to laugh or to cry. Who discovered that there was no such thing as a witch - the priest, the parson? No, these never discover anything.
god sarcastic education
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
funny life god
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
god fashion leaving
Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement. If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board...
god rewards interest
The gods offer no rewards for intellect. There was never one yet that showed any interest in it...
pirate sailing good-god
Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.
atheist thug if-there-is-a-god
If there is a God, he is a malign thug.
god character catholic
What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to be everything.