Mark Twain
Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
book want faces
I don't want no better book than what your face is.
views politics next
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
inspirational motivational hero
If everyone was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes.
sex men giving
Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.
children school men
Thou shalt not commit adultry is a command which makes no distinction between the following persons. They are all required to obey it: children at birth. Children in the cradle. School children. Youths and maidens. Fresh adults. Older ones. Men and women of 40. Of 50. Of 60. Of 70. Of 80. Of 100. The command does not distribute its burden equally, and cannot. It is not hard upon the three sets of children.
eden
Wheresoever she was, there was Eden.
teaching men fool
You have heretofore found out, by my teachings, that man is a fool; you are now aware that woman is a damned fool.
funny-friendship exercise funeral
I take my only exercise acting as a pallbearer at the funerals of my friends who exercise regularly.
hands play sound-judgment
It is sound judgment to put on a bold face and play your hand for a hundred times what it is worth; forty-nine times out of fifty nobody dares to call it, and you roll in the chips.
long hamlet-and-ophelia speech
To be, or not to be; that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life;
outsiders measurement size
the size of a misfortune is not determinable by an outsider’s measurement of it but only by the measurements applied to it by the person specially affected by it.
teaching character writing
there was no crime in unconscious plagiarism; that I committed it everyday, that he committed it everyday, that every man alive on earth who writes or speaks commits it every day and not merely once or twice but every time he open his mouth… there is nothing of our own in it except some slight change born of our temperament, character, environment, teachings and associations
heart men animal
He said that man’s heart was the only bad heart in the animal kingdom; that man was the only animal capable of feeling malice, envy, vindictiveness, revengefulness, hatred, selfishness, the only animal that loves drunkenness, almost the only animal that could endure personal uncleanliness and a filthy habitation, the sole animal in whom was fully developed the base instinct called patriotism, the sole animal that robs, persecutes, oppresses and kills members of his own tribe, the sole animal that steals and enslaves the members of any tribe.
deeds want doe
Steal a chicken if you get a chance, Huck, because if you don't want it, someone else does and a good deed ain't never forgotten.