Kristen Schaal
Kristen Schaal
Kristen Schaalis an American actress, voice artist, writer, and comedian. She is best known for her roles as Mel on the HBO series Flight of the Conchords, Louise Belcher on FOX animated comedy Bob's Burgers, and Mabel Pines on Gravity Falls. Other notable roles include her appearances as a commentator on The Daily Show, Amanda Simmons on The Hotwives of Orlando, Hazel Wassername on 30 Rock, Victoria Best on WordGirl, Trixie from the Toy Story franchise, and Anne on Wilfred...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actress
Date of Birth24 January 1978
CityLongmont, CO
CountryUnited States of America
I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.
Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.
I prefer writing for myself to perform, I guess. But if I had to choose, I'd rather perform in someone's movie than write a movie for someone else.
I wanted to make sure that my act was family friendly for tonight, but I don't have babies. So I thought that maybe I could pretend that I had babies and that way I could appeal to the people in the audience who have babies and to the people who like to pretend that they have babies.
The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.
Turkeys are peacocks that have really let themselves go.
All the best movies are the ones that are cut from a more middle ground.
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently?
I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like.
You know, quite a few species of fish require two or more sexual partners...
I'm so happy to be around people. I just really like people, and being a freelancer can be lonely during the day, when you're at home trying to write anything you can.
I would love for people to know that the label 'feminist' is something that everyone should wear proudly, because it just means that you support women.
Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies.
Most of the people I know in comedy are not weird or messed up.