Augusten Burroughs
Augusten Burroughs
Augusten Xon Burroughsis an American writer known for his New York Times bestselling memoir Running with Scissors...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionMemoirist
Date of Birth23 October 1965
CountryUnited States of America
bored machines next
We were young. We were bored. And the old electroshock therapy machine was just under the stairs in a box next to the Hoover.
obsessed certain
The more obsessed one is with getting thin, the more certain it becomes that one will never get there.
quality garbage essentials
Sometimes when you work in advertising you'll get a product that's really garbage and you have to make it seem fantastic, something that is essential to the continued quality of life.
smart school nursing
and she's a nurse. do you know how hard nursing school is? it's like medical school. so she's obviously smart.
brother desire taste
My brother was born without taste or the desire to be professionally lit.
new-york cities locks
New York City is a place where you can lock yourself up in your little studio apartment, and not go outside at all, and not feel in the slightest guilty about it.
eye moved-on different
In the opening to the Mary Tyler Moore Show Mary's in the supermarket, hurrying through the aisles. She pauses at the meat case, picks up a steak and checks the price. Then rolls her eyes, shrugs and tosses it in the cart. That's kind of how I feel. Sure I would have liked things to be different. But, 'roll of eyes' what can you do? 'shrug' I threw the meat in my cart and moved on.
real people facts
Like cubic zirconia, I only look real. I'm an imposter. The fact is, I am not like other people.
band chicago my-favorite
But my favorite band is Curbside Life, out of Chicago.
book ideas physics
I read a lot of science books - I love cosmology, quantum theory, particle physics. So my idea of a great read would probably put you directly into a coma.
children teenager school
My instinct was always have your gun in your hand. Especially when you are telling somebody to do something. But, in fact, the police academy discourages this. They feel your gun should rarely, if ever, be brought out of its holster. Most certainly not when children are involved, which is exactly when I saw myself using my gun most often. A truant teenager loitering outside a movie theater is going to be far more motivated to return to school when he has the barrel of a .45 pressed against his cheek.
interesting long people
Marriage is overdone. As long as there are people, people are going to find it interesting.
drink applause constant
Applause is a constant thing in AA. It's how we buy drinks for each other.
drinking giving way
In some ways, blogging is like drinking - it gives a person permission to be a total asshole.