Arthur Smith
Arthur Smith
fall play half
I see my large nose, like half an avocado. I broke it falling downstairs when I was six, and it now resembles a large blob of play-dough.
funny fall swimming
The history of the relationship between comedy and swimming is short indeed. Of course it is always funny when someone falls into water, but that's about it.
falling-in-love garden long
If you want to be happy for a short time, get drunk happy for a long time, fall in love; happy forever, take up gardening.
ended later lunch point unless week
I couldn't really see the point of having lunch unless it started at one and ended a week later in Monte Carlo.
brutally last time until versus
This time it was much more intense. Last year, the contestants were kind of 'us versus Gordon' right up until the end - this was brutally competitive right from the beginning.
author weighs
The book may be garbage, but if it weighs in at a kilo or more, I stand before its author in awe.
doubt few provides time
The Bible has no doubt had much influence in its time, but it provides very few laughs. None, in fact.
bad
Sometimes it's bad to do something you've never done before.
Someone once described me as the Zelig of comedy, and I think I know what he means.
appeared humour introduce laughed
When synchronised swimming first appeared on TV, we laughed very heartily, and I, for one, applauded the decision to introduce humour into the Olympics.
admiring reader review savage
A savage review is much more entertaining for the reader than an admiring one; the little misanthrope in each of us relishes the rubbishing of someone else.
hours impressed meet pastime spend writers
I myself am pathetically impressed when I meet writers of very long novels. How can they spend so many hundreds of hours at the miserable, lonely pastime of creating fiction?
dies
When a writer dies you get a higher standard of obituary.
again given invited london love playing upsetting
It is London fashion week, and once again I haven't been invited to any shows. This is upsetting given my well-known love of fashion, or, as I think of it, playing with the dressing-up box.