Andy Rooney
Andy Rooney
Andrew Aitken "Andy" Rooneywas an American radio and television writer who was best known for his weekly broadcast "A Few Minutes with Andy Rooney," a part of the CBS News program 60 Minutes from 1978 to 2011. His final regular appearance on 60 Minutes aired on October 2, 2011. He died one month later, on November 4, 2011, at age 92...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionJournalist
Date of Birth14 January 1919
CityAlbany, NY
CountryUnited States of America
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
Let's face it, though, anything that's apt to happen to an appliance like a blender isn't covered by the warranty anyway, so I never send them in. If it breaks, I'll buy a new one. That's the American way.
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.
When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more kindergartens and fewer graduate schools.
Small daily happenings make life spectacular.... start enjoying the small things in life!
One of the sweetest things in life: a letter from a friend.
It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.
I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.
Don't give it to Katie. Give it to a bunch of reporters and make CBS News the best news operation in the world.
Don't pin much hope on the mail, and when the phone rings don't expect anyone wonderful to be calling
Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is believed that by the year 2030 there will be a large number of people wandering around with huge breasts an
Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.