Famous Quotes & Sayings

David Letterman

People are kind of upset with British Petroleum CEO Tony Hayward. Over the weekend, he was out on his yacht. And when President Obama found out that Tony Hayward was on his yacht, he was so angry, he missed a putt.

David Letterman

Over the weekend Mitt Romney went body surfing. He has not body surfed since the '90s when he starred on 'Baywatch.'

David Letterman

Over the weekend, of course, down there in Washington, D.C., they had the big White House Correspondents' Dinner. Do you know who was really funny? President Obama. So funny, in fact, he has already been promised 'The Tonight Show' in five years.

David Letterman

Mitt Romney and his family have a big two-day weekend plan. They're going to hike to the top of his money.

David Letterman

Are you getting a big kick out of the Enron scandal? I find this interesting that whenever a big crisis starts, people start showing up in church. So, Ken Lay shows up in church this weekend. Church officials are still looking for the collection plates.

He'll be back, but whether it's this week or not I don't know.

It could be two weeks or it could be the season.

Michael Campbell

It is a long way to come for one week and go back again,

We may see another week or two of increases.

Rick Barnes

Greg never has been a 'me' person. He's never had a 'me' week or a 'me' month.

I wish we could have been there a week before,

If we play like that every week we will win a lot of games.

Annika Sorenstam

I have had two weeks off and I'm rested,

We've been doing that for two weeks now.

We've had a whole week of preparation here. We'll be ready.

Paul Johnson

We'll have to see. Two weeks into the spring, we'll have an idea of the separation.

We think the weekend has something for everyone. Come out and play.

John Smoltz

This whole week is important, not just necessarily tomorrow.

Earl Watson

This whole week has been great. They really know how to make us feel special.

Carrie Fisher

You know how most illnesses have symptoms you can recognize? Like fever, upset stomach, chills, whatever. Well, with manic depression, it's sexual promiscuity, excessive spending, and substance abuse - and that just sounds like a fantastic weekend in Vegas to me!

Pat Riley

I think he is a week away from conditioning.

We're celebrating it all week here at the library.

That week was surreal. We were numb, we made it through it.

Joe Gibbs

Two weeks in a row, he's been pretty impressive.

James Blake

It doesn't get better than this, ... If every week were like this I would never retire.

John Mulaney

It was funny to be an emcee, because you're so at the mercy of the club. You can show up for the weekend hoping to get the $400 - and get fired. I had to prank whoever they told me to prank.

Joel McHale

It's an awesome thing to be flung out onto the stage twice a weekend in front of 250 people, and you have to make it up as you go along.

Jimmy Swaggart

If I do not return to the pulpit this weekend, millions of people will go to hell.

Jimmy Fallon

A top aide to Donald Trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of Trump's public feuds, but Trump said he was fired. When asked what he was fired for, Trump said, 'Quitting!'

Jimmy Fallon

This weekend President Obama attended the annual Gridiron Club Dinner, and during his speech he joked that he is getting older and crankier. Which explains why he announced he no longer supports President Obama.

Jimmy Fallon

George W. Bush gave a commencement speech at Southern Methodist University this weekend. It was pretty inspirational. He said, 'As I like to tell the 'C' students, you too can be president.' Even George W. Bush has George W. Bush comedy material in his act.

George Clooney

I've been lucky enough to do a few films that will last longer than an opening weekend and those films are the ones I'm proud of.

George Clooney

It's not about an opening weekend. It's about a career, building a set of films you're proud of. Period.