Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

Think, for a moment, of the countless happy childhood hours you spent with this amazing device: Drawing perfect horizontals, drawing perfect verticals, drawing really spastic diagonals, trying to scrape away the silver powder from the window so you could look inside.

Dave Barry

Take the folks at Coca-Cola. For many years, they were content to sit back and make the same old carbonated beverage. It was a good beverage, no question about it; generations of people had grown up drinking it and doing the experiment in sixth grade where you put a nail into a glass of Coke and after a couple of days the nail dissolves and the teacher says: Imagine what it does to your TEETH! So Coca-Cola was solidly entrenched in the market, and the management saw no need to improve ...

Dave Barry

And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West.

Dave Barry

The voice belonged to Mr. Pzyrbovich, an algebra teacher who was always called Mr. P, for obvious reasons. He has a heavy accent, which a lot of kids said made him hard to understand, although to be fair some of these kids would have never understood algebra anyway.

Dave Barry

Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will dead-end in a Disney parking area large enough to have its own climate, populated by large nomadic families who have been trying to find their cars since the Carter administration.

Dave Barry

I guess libertarianism is always considered so weird and fringe that people assume that you're in the closet if you don't go around talking about it.

Dave Barry

Here's my proposal, which is based on the TV show Survivor: We put the entire Congress on an island. All the food on this island is locked inside a vault, which can be opened only by an ordinary American taxpayer named Bob. Every day, the congresspersons are given a section of the Tax Code, which they must rewrite so that Bob can understand it. If he can, he lets them eat that day; if he can't, he doesn't.

Dave Barry

I was a middle-of-the-road Democrat more than anything else. I know I voted for Carter. Watergate taught me how bad the Republicans were.

Dave Barry

I have never had a point in my life to make. I'm just trying to entertain the reader.

Dave Barry

I think I became funny because I grew up in the Bronx. I was small and weak and Jewish instead of large and fierce and Puerto Rican. You need something.

Dave Barry

When to arrive at the airport?: You should be at the airport already.

Dave Barry

Never try to put all the chemicals in the entire world in your body at the same time.

Dave Barry

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.

Dave Barry

Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. You can't see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything.

Dave Barry

The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins.

Dave Barry

Hardware: where the people in your company's software section will tell you the problem is. Software: where the people in your company's hardware section will tell you the problem is.

Dave Barry

And that's the wonderful thing about family travel: it provides you with experiences that will remain locked forever in the scar tissue of your mind.

Dave Barry

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.

Dave Barry

To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life.

Dave Barry

Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.

Dave Barry

It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.

Dave Barry

You don't have to think really hard to get the joke. I think humor in general appeals to all people.

Dave Barry

I really try to think cinematically, because that's how people read. They create a theater in their minds.

Dave Barry

Technology is constantly improving our lives. Look at the cellular telephone. Just ten years ago, virtually nobody was able to get into a car crash caused by trying to steer and dial at the same time; today, people do this all the time.

David Suzuki

Environmentalism isn't a discipline or specialty. It's a way of seeing our place in the world. And we need everybody to see the world that way. Don't think 'In order to make a difference I have to become an environmentalist.'

David Suzuki

It is clear that while science provides insights into the complexity of the world around us, those insights...present a fractured mosaic rather than a seamless whole. There are profound limits to science that must be recognized if we are to minimize the destructive consequences of using the powers provided by scientific discovery.

David Strathairn

I checked out all types of tobacco trying to find one that would be easiest to live with, I ended up using pipe tobacco. It burned slower, and it wasn't as harsh on my throat... It also smelled better.

David Strathairn

So much money and energy is expended making a film that I think it should be used for positive ends.

David Strathairn

You work enough with someone and you develop a shorthand. You know how he likes to work through the day and he knows where you're vulnerable and where your weaknesses and strengths are, so it makes for a good team, a team that knows who's over there behind your back.

David Strathairn

I don't think I could've carried the weight that Murrow carried.

David Strathairn

If anyone was talking about journalism in the '50s - it was Edward R.Murrow.

David Sze

I think there are a lot of companies that are staying private longer. Much more of their growth is happening while they are on the private side. So their valuations are hitting $1 billion while they are still private more often.

David Sze

When I started in the business in 1999 and 2000, we had companies that were going public in two, three or four years.