Famous Quotes & Sayings

Steven Wright

Sometimes I talk to myself in languages I'm unfamiliar with... just to screw with my subconscious.

Steven Wright

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

Steven Wright

Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.

Steven Wright

Only one in four jokes ever works, and I still can't predict what people will laugh at.

Steven Wright

Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!

Steven Wright

I bought a cheap piece of land... It was on someone else’s property.

Steven Strogatz

Looking at numbers as groups of rocks may seem unusual, but actually it's as old as math itself. The word "calculate" reflects that legacy - it comes from the Latin word calculus, meaning a pebble used for counting. To enjoy working with numbers you don't have to be Einstein (German for "one stone"), but it might help to have rocks in your head.

Seth

Now: For those of you who are lazy I can offer no hope: death will not bring you an eternal resting place. You may rest, if this is your wish, for a while. Not only must you use your abilities after death, however, but you must face up to yourself for those that you did not use during your previous existence...

Sebastian Arcelus

I majored in political science, and my concentration was U.S. involvement in Latin America in the 20th century.

Sean O'Casey

A waste land lit by holy candles.

Sean O'Casey

A laugh is the loud echo of a sigh; a sigh the faint echo of a laugh.

Sean O'Casey

Laughter is wine for the soul - laughter soft, or loud and deep, tinged through with seriousness - the hilarious declaration made by man that life is worth living.

Sean O'Casey

Laughter tends to mock the pompous and the pretentious; all man's boastful gadding about, all his pretty pomps, his hoary customs, his wornout creeds, changing the glitter of them into the dullest hue of lead.

Sean Patrick Flanery

I got into Taekwondo when I was nine, and I started training Muay Thai and Brazilian Jujitsu later in life.

L. Ron Hubbard

Music is indeed the Universal Language.

Li Ka-shing

Buying land is not like buying antique. It is not the only deal available.

Lewis Thomas

We are spectacular splendid manifestations of life. We have language. We have affection. And finally, and perhaps best of all, we have music.

Leslie Charteris

I am an absurd idealist. But I believe that all that must come true. For, unless it comes true, the world will be laid desolate. And I believe that it can come true. I believe that, by the grace of God, men will awake presently and be men again, and colour and laughter and splendid living will return to a grey civilisation. But that will only come true because a few men will believe in it, and fight for it, and fight in its name against everything that sneers and snarls at that ideal.

Lesley Stahl

It is actually against the law for a citizen to give money to a terrorist.

Lesley Nicol

I guess that is my favorite thing - to make people laugh and also to maybe engage them emotionally and touch them somehow in telling the story.

Leslie Fiedler

I admire Ginsberg as a poet, despite the fact that he seems not to know when he is being good and when he is bad. But he will last, or at least those poems will last.

Leonard Orr

Personal law is simply the thought that controls your mind and your life more than any other thought. Finding that thought is the most valuable knowledge that you can have about yourself. It is like the leverage on personal change. It enables you to change very efficiently.

Lee Kuan Yew

It is not the practice, now will I allow subversives to get away by insisting that I’ve got to prove everything against them in a court of law or [produce] evidence that will stand up to the strict rules of evidence of a court of law.

Lee Kuan Yew

The same law applies to me. Nobody has sued me for libel because I do not defame my enemies.

Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Invent a new language anyone can understand.

Lawrence Durrell

Shyness has laws you can only give yourself; tragically to those who least understand.

Lawrence Durrell

Brazil is bigger than Europe, wilder than Africa, and weirder than Baffin Land.

Larry Charles

The major caveat in all of comedy is that it's all instinctive. There's no true criteria. There is no right or wrong. Ultimately, often I'm surprised at what an audience will or will not laugh at. I have to stay very, very open to an audiences first exposure to that material and how they react to it.

Larry Elder

Rent-control laws disproportionately benefit the non-poor because the elite pull strings, work the system and are better connected than the non-poor.

Larry Ellison

I'm right, and everyone else is wrong.

Larry David

Making a woman laugh. What is that about? And the prettier the woman, the more satisfaction I get. It doesn't make any sense, but I'm being honest.

Larry David

I got a Swede lawyer?!? She's gonna get everything!

Larry David

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.