Famous Quotes & Sayings

Alan Bennett

Here I sit, alone at 60, Bald and fat and full of sin Cold the seat, and loud the cistern As I read the (Harpic) (Lysol) tin

Chris Brown

My best kiss was on stage. Kelly Rowland from Destiny's Child gave me a really nice soft kiss on my lips during a performance on my birthday. It was amazing.

Chloe Grace Moretz

My mom won't let me buy high-fashion stuff unless it's TK Maxx or a birthday occasion.

David Sedaris

It's odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You'll have a nice time, then two years later you'll be like, 'There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?'

Dave Barry

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Dave Barry

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Dave Barry

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!

Dave Barry

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.

Catherine Bell

The main prank that we play with props is for people's birthdays. The special effects people will put a little explosive in the cake so it blows up in their face - that's always fun to play on a guest star, or one of the trainees or someone who's new.

Charles Caleb Colton

The wealth is ultimately just a relative thing. As a person with little money and little more needs to rich guys money but really wishes

Alan Parsons

I try to find a way that the other guy hasn't thought of using a sound or a sample.

Al Sharpton

Bill Clinton strikes me as the kind of guy who goes wherever the polls lead him, rather than leading the polls.

Akshay Kumar

I'm an athletic actor. I'm known for my action; I'm a guy who does my own stunts on screen.

Chris Bauer

I'm the kind of guy who would say, "Yeah, I'll do that!," and then, when it came down to it, I would be absolutely petrified. Those days have passed me by, but I would do it. If it meant that I was in a scene naked with a woman, or anybody romantic, I'd be into it.

Chip Kelly

Tommy's [Gamble] an East Coast guy, so he kind of talks fast and in quick statements and phrases, so I understood him and he understood me, and we just hit it off.

Dave Franco

I'm trying to avoid any more asshole roles, at least for a little bit. The main criteria for me when choosing a project is a good director. I just want to work with these guys that I admire because I do want to direct my own films one day, and I want to pick their brains to see what their process is like, and see what I can take from that.

Dave Franco

I'm a small shifty kind of guy.

Dave Chappelle

I'm happier in the way a guy gets happier when he starts to mature. It doesn't make things easier, but I'm so much better at handling them.

David Sedaris

If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?

Bo Burnham

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

Audrey Meadows

Fans always ask, What did the bedroom look like? All they ever saw was Alice or Ralph going in and out.

Arnold Bennett

Saw Washington Monument. Phallic. Appalling. A national catastrophe.

Deborah Harkness

You do angry. I just saw it. And you left at least one hole in my carpet to prove it.

Dennis Hopper

I wanted to be an actor. I decided when I was very young, when I first saw movies, that I wanted to be an actor.

Bill Murray

If you walk up to some random person on the street, grab them by the shoulder, and say 'Did you just see what I saw?!', you'll find that no-one wants to talk to you.

Carol Leifer

There were very few women comics when I started out doing stand-up. But I always saw that as a great advantage.

Charlie Crist

I was a Republican, and I saw the activists and what they were doing; it was intolerable to me.