Related Quotes
funny pain philosophy
I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. Carol Leifer
funny men humans
It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon.
funny waiting almost-done
Ask her to wait a moment I am almost done. Carl Friedrich Gauss
funny patience humor
Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. Agnes Repplier
funny women humor
Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.
funny sarcastic war
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. Abba Eban
funny marriage witty
Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens? Alan King
funny-inspirational integrity technology
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves. Alan Kay
funny girl humor
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. Charlie Chaplin
hilarious military flower
If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when there WAS a military conflict, everybody involved would feel just awful and there would soon be a high-level exchange of notes written on greeting cards with flowers on the front, followed by a Peace Luncheon Dave Barry
hilarious pipes ran
wouldn't it be hilarious if he ran his pipes through (fill in the blank)? Preston Sturges
hilarious fun giving
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back. Bill Watterson
hilarious people favors
Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? Benny Hill
hilarious struggle cupcakes
Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes. Bob Thaves
hilarious two cards
Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator. Daniel Handler
hilarious lying ifs
If you have something to say and say nothing, you are really telling a lie. Ashleigh Brilliant
hilarious looks unexpected
Look how often the unexpected happens - yet we still never expect it.
hilarious believe fate
One possible reason that I don't believe in fate is that I wasn't fated to.
truth mathematical-equations discovery
If others would but reflect on mathematical truths as deeply and continuously as I have, they would make my discoveries.
truth philosopher corny
When a philosopher says something that is true then it is trivial. When he says something that is not trivial then it is false.
truth naked nudity
There are few nudities so objectionable as the naked truth.
truthful wonderful guidance
If you're really truthful with yourself, it's a wonderful guidance.
truth men hands
Nothing from man's hands, nor law, nor constitution, can be final. Truth alone is final. Charles Sumner
truth greatness men
It is a melancholy truth that even great men have their poor relations. Charles Dickens
truth light lines
Truth can hardly be expected to adapt herself to the crooked policy and wily sinuosities of worldly affairs; for truth, like light, travels only in straight lines. Charles Caleb Colton
truth roots errors
It is not so difficult a task as to plant new truths, as to root out old errors
truth honesty integrity
Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of trick and duplicity, than straightforward and simple integrity in another.