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funny pain philosophy
I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. Carol Leifer
funny men humans
It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon. Carol Leifer
funny waiting almost-done
Ask her to wait a moment I am almost done. Carl Friedrich Gauss
funny patience humor
Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. Agnes Repplier
funny women humor
Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. Agnes Repplier
funny sarcastic war
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. Abba Eban
funny marriage witty
Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens? Alan King
funny-inspirational integrity technology
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves. Alan Kay
funny girl humor
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. Charlie Chaplin
crazy player half
It's going to be crazy. I'm guessing when we play against the Dominicans, half the field will be Dominican fans and half will be Puerto Rican fans. With all the big-time players in the World Classic, it's going to be huge. Carlos Beltran
crazy nsa
There's something totally crazy about this. Carl Bernstein
crazy artist people
If you're any good as an artist, you have to be doing something nobody else has interest in. Nobody would be interested in my work except a few crazy people. Carl Andre
crazy want not-sure
I want to convey that I'm crazy about the Kardashians - but I'm not sure which is which. Aaron Sorkin
crazy people entrepreneur
An entrepreneur is not what you call yourself, it's what someone calls you in recognition of what you've achieved. I call Richard Branson an entrepreneur. Rupert Murdoch called me one. Anybody who stands up and says: 'I'm an entrepreneur' needs shooting. You'll drive people crazy. Alan Sugar
crazy school play
I was at a school in England, a prep school, from the ages of 8 and 13. And every play they did was a musical. Parents love musicals. And I don't sing. It was driving me crazy. 'We're doing 'Macbeth.'' 'Yes!' 'The musical!' And I was always in the chorus, because of course, in all the main parts, you had to be able to sing. Charlie Cox
crazy guitar two
A friend of mine, that I had known for some time, came up one day with an old guitar. I don't know where he got it, I don't know how long he'd had it, but he knew about two chords on it. He proceeded to teach them to me, and then we proceeded to go crazy over music. Charlie Daniels
crazy rain hands
The rain and hail pattered against the glass; the chimneys quaked and rocked; the crazy casement rattled with the wind, as though an impatient hand inside were striving to burst it open. But no hand was there, and it opened no more. Charles Dickens
crazy dots steam
The late 90s were crazy science-fictional if you were inside the superheated steam bubble of the dot-com 1.0 industry. Charles Stross
native-american men thinking
Do you think we care about the feelings of Native Americans when we celebrate Columbus Day? That's the day that the white man discovered a land where Indians had been living for a few thousand years. Carlos Mencia
native-american men rocks
Thus the white men and Native Americans were able, through the spirit of goodwill and compromise, to reach the first in what would become a long series of mutually beneficial, breached agreements that enabled the two cultures to coexist peacefully for stretches of twenty and sometimes even thirty days, after which it was usually necessary to negotiate new agreements that would be even more mutual and beneficial, until eventually the Native Americans were able to perceive the vast mutual benefits of living in rock-strewn sectors of South Dakota. Dave Barry
native-american land people
The occupation of America (and Columbus's arrival quite clearly was an occupation, no one can deny that) meant that the entire history of the Native Americans was rendered invisible. The land could only be occupied if it was first defined as empty. So it was defined as a wilderness, even though it had been used by native people for millennia. Vandana Shiva
native-american roots issues
When the wilderness movement emerged, it emerged separate from the issue of social inequality and the economic problems of survival. It was a preservationist ecology movement created by an occupying culture. Clearly, a wilderness movement started by Native Americans would not have had the same roots. Vandana Shiva
native-american gun steel
It invites a search for ultimate causes: why were Europeans, rather than Africans or Native Americans, the ones to end up with guns, the nastiest germs, and steel? Jared Diamond
native-american epidemics giving
It's striking that Native Americans evolved no devastating epidemic diseases to give to Europeans, in return for the many devastating epidemic diseases that Indians received from the Old World. Jared Diamond
native-american people earth
Every part of the earth is sacred to my people. Chief Seattle
native-american heart earth
Your religion was written on tablets of stone, ours on our hearts. 8. We are part of the earth and the earth is part of us. Chief Seattle
native-american web-of-life earth-day
All things are bound together. All things connect. Chief Seattle