Famous Quotes & Sayings

Charles Caleb Colton

Shakespeare, Butler and Bacon have rendered it extremely difficult for all who come after them to be sublime, witty or profound.

Charles Simmons

Euphonic and harmonious expressions, forcible and just expressions, profound and comprehensive expressions, and especially apt and witty expressions, each have their specific influence upon different minds, and their common influence upon all minds.... It is therefore high time our most valuable aphorisms and paragraphs were put in order for frequent perusal, and for handy reference, as the circumstances of life call up subjects.

Dave Barry

A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

Dave Barry

What I think is that the F-word is basically just a convenient nasty-sounding word that we tend to use when we would really like to come up with a terrific-ally witty insult, the kind Winston Churchill always came up with when enormous women asked him stupid questions at parties.

Dave Barry

You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

Dave Barry

I will vote for the first candidate who promises to use nuclear missiles against LinkedIn.

Dave Barry

Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.

Caroline Dhavernas

It's very witty and it's great to see teenage characters have control that way. And you can actually hear about sex and pot and it's okay, it's not completely bad and you can't say that to teenagers.

Catherine the Great

Your wits make others witty.

Charles Dickens

Make them laugh, make them cry, make them wait.

Charles Spurgeon

My soul, never laugh at sin's fooleries, lest thou come to smile at sin itself. It is thine enemy, and thy Lord's enemy.

Alan Bradley

I was learning that among friends, a smile can be better than a belly laugh.

Alan Alda

Nothing important was ever accomplished without chutzpah. Columbus had chutzpah. The signers of the Declaration of Independence had chutzpah. Don't ever aim doubt at yourself. Laugh at yourself, but don't doubt yourself.

Chita Rivera

I love to laugh, I love the joy of life, and I love sharing it.

Dave Chappelle

I just always loved stand-up. It's like magic. You say something, and a whole room full of people laughs together. Say something else, they laugh again. The fact that people come to see that and participate in that... I don't know, it's just like magic.

David Sedaris

When you read comic material and people aren't laughing how do you know they're listening.

David Sedaris

To say that a humorist exaggerates to get big laughs, I don't see how that's big news.

Buddy Ebsen

The one flaw in this is that you can't hear the people laughing.

Charles Dickens

Vengeance and retribution require a long time; it is the rule.

Charles Dickens

Scattered wits take a long time in picking up.

Charles Stanley

You may go through difficulty, hardship, or trial—but as long as you are anchored to Him, you will have hope.

Charles Spurgeon

I long for nothing more earnestly than to serve God with all my might.

Charles Spurgeon

I am not the only one that condemns the idle; for once when I was going to give our minister a pretty long list of the sins of one of our people that he was asking after, I began with, "He's dreadfully lazy." "That's enough," said the old gentleman; " all sorts of sins are in that one.

Charles Spurgeon

Time, how short-eternity, how long! Death, how brief-immortali ty, how endless!

Charles Spurgeon

He who does not long to know more of Christ, knows nothing of him yet.

Charles Spurgeon

Satan does not care whether he drags you down to hell as a Calvinist or as an Arminian, so long as he can get you there.

Alan Watts

Essentially Satori is a sudden experience, and it is often described as a "turning over" of the mind, just as a pair of scales will suddenly turn over when a sufficient amount of material has been poured into one pan to overbalance the weight in the other. Hence it is an experience which generally occurs after a long and concentrated effort to discover the meaning of Zen.