Famous Quotes & Sayings

Chip Kidd

Hey, have you heard that one about the difference between me, Wit, and my loutish cousin, Hilarity? No? Okay, so I walk into a bar, you see, very unassuming, and order a martini. Then the bartender, Hilarity, hauls off and squirts me in the face with a seltzer bottle, ruining my n ice new camel hair suit, dousing my monocle and my watch fob, soaking my cravat. So, do I let him have what for, and blow my top? I do not. I simply say: Sorry, I believe I said 'very dry'.

Chill Wills

Win, lose or draw, you're all my cousins and I love you.

David Lange

Bassett was a member of parliament and a cousin on my father's side of the family. My father delivered him and it became plain in later days that he must have dropped him.

David Taras

If George Bush can't get along with Stephen Harper, he can't get along with any world leader. They're ideological cousins, if not twins.

Bryan Clay

Our house was always full of grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins.

Bo Burnham

How old is too old to stop believing in, like, the tooth fairy? Like 12? I've got a cousin who is 18... Yeah, still believes in gay marriage.

Bill Kelly

My cousin is an agoraphobic homosexual, which makes it kind of hard for him to come out of the closet.

Eddie Izzard

Queen Victoria, one of our more frumpy Queen's. They're all frumpy aren't they? Because it's a bad idea when cousin's marry.

David Icke

The Goldschmidts had joined forces with other Rothschild cousins, the Bischoffsheims, to form a banking partnership which financed the North in the American Civil War.

Charles Caleb Colton

Fame is an undertaker that pays but little attention to the living, but bedizens the dead, furnishes out their funerals, and follows them to the grave

William Shakespeare

Thrift, thrift, Horatio! The funeral bak'd meats did coldly furnish forth the marriage tables.

Charles Bradlaugh

[That] my body be buried as cheaply as possible and no speeches be permitted at my funeral.

Marilyn Miller

We want to make sure they can't do this at the funeral of a hero.

Charles Bukowski

You are thirty minutes late." "Yes." "Would you be thirty minutes late to a wedding or a funeral?" "No." "Why not, pray tell?" "Well, if the funeral was mine I'd have to be on time. If the wedding was mine it would be my funeral.

Eugene Kennedy

The priesthood is not dying, but the clerical state is dead. It needs to be buried, preferably with a Viking funeral in Boston Harbor so nobody can miss the spectacle of its passing.

Alexander the Great

I foresee a great funeral contest over me.

Amy Poehler

We may all host ourselves to death, and if we're all dead who will host our funerals?

Dwight L. Moody

I hunted all through the four Gospels trying to find one of Christ's funeral sermons, but I couldn't find any. I found He broke up every funeral He ever attended! Death couldn't exist where He was.

Charles Stewart Parnell

Do what is beyond your strength even should you fail sometimes.

Dave Chappelle

I enjoy my own thoughts sometimes.

David D. Burns

You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.

Cesar Romero

Sometimes, I wonder what I'm doing here.

Cal Ripken, Jr.

I didn’t just show up for work, as has sometimes been said. I also showed up to work.

Bryan Batt

I live a bi-coastal and sometimes tri-coastal life.

Bryan Lee O'Malley

I'm sometimes sort of in touch with the readership, and they seem to have perceptive questions, for the most part.

Catherynne M. Valente

Well, very splendid and very frightening. But splendid things are often frightening. Sometimes, it's the fright that makes them splendid at all.

Casey Stengel

Sometimes it's easier to understand things than it is to figure them out