Related Quotes
funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse.
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people.
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner. Charles Caleb Colton
funny age fifty
I'm aiming by the time I'm fifty to stop being an adolescent.
life strong truth
There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth.
life saying-goodbye expectations
Life is made of ever so many partings welded together.
life autism world
This is a world of action, and not moping and droning in.
life moral existence
Let us be moral. Let us contemplate existence.
life littles
Do all the good you can and make as little fuss about it as possible.
life people astonishing
It is astonishing how much more people are interested in lengthening life than improving it.
life soul prison
Life is the jailer of the soul in this filthy prison, and its only deliverer is death.
life happiness dark
Much too oft we make life gloomy-- When happy we might be, If we gathered more of sunshine, And not dark shadows see.
life distance journey
Evils in the journey of life are like the hills which alarm travelers upon their road; they both appear great at a distance, but when we approach them we find that they are far less insurmountable than we had conceived.
humorous eye men
There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.
humorous mind looks
Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it. David Sedaris
humorous school world
England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria. Dave Barry
humorous son english-history
English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.
humorous rocks design
The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..
humorous years europe
The Romans spent the next 200 years using their great engineering skill to construct ruins all over Europe.
humorous keys germany
One key lesson of history is that virtually anything, including afternoon or evening thundershowers, causes Germany to invade Belgium.
humorous gambling blood
Nevada has a very dynamic economy, with gambling being the number-one industry, followed closely by blood donorship.
humorous hotel-lobby france
Europeans, like some Americans, drive on the right side of the road, except in England, where they drive on both sides of the road; Italy, where they drive on the sidewalk; and France, where if necessary they will follow you right into the hotel lobby.