Famous Quotes & Sayings

Larry David

People have often wondered how they'd feel if they were adopted. I think it's funny.

Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words mank and ind. What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.

Susan Stroman

Mel has written 10 new songs, and they're very funny. It's a year and a half away from opening on Broadway.

Billy Corgan

The funny thing about me that most people never really understand is that, at heart, I'm really a jock.

Bill Shankly

A football team is like a piano. You need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing.

Bill Engvall

He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot."

Bill Engvall

My son is 12 now, and is really getting into girls. A lot. But the thing about twelve year old boys is that they don't possess what I like to call that ... discretionary gene yet. We were walking home from the ballfield the other day and there was a woman walking towards us who was ... gifted. I saw them, and I saw him see them. But she was too close for me to go, "Dude, shut up." She hadn't walked two feet behind us and he goes "God dang, did you see the SIZE of those things?" And all I could say was "Yeah, I did!"

Bill Engvall

No parents. You have Uncle Jesse, forever in overalls. Then there's Bo and Duke. What do they do? I never saw them working for food or gas money. You can only kill so many possum.

Bill Engvall

I thought "RV" stood for "Recreational Vehicle." No! It stands for "Ruins Vacations."

Cameron Diaz

Grease is the only cure for a hangover.

Alan Garner

It's where I keep all my things. Get a lot of compliments on this. Plus it's not a purse, it's called a satchel. Indiana Jones wears one.

Alan Garner

Im not supposed to be within two hundred feet of a school or a Chuck E. Cheese.

Brian Molko

When every day became a hangover and when you look at yourself in the mirror and go 'I don't like how you're coming across to people.' and when every day just started to feel the same. After the 50th shag, it doesn't mean so much anymore.

Adam Gopnik

Americans also seem to believe that the monarchy is a kind of mediaeval hangover, encumbered by premodern notions of decorum; the reality is that the British monarchy, for good or ill, is a modern political institution perhaps the first modern political institution.

Phil Collins

I have never been a Conservative, or at least not since being a young teenager. My father voted Conservative, and even his doing that was a hangover from the '50s and '60s, which may have been an influence on me.

Colin Quinn

Well... you know, I would wake up with a terrible hangover in a jail somewhere and worst part was that I would not know why I was there.

Dave Grohl

There's something about heartbreak that makes for great music, but the same could be said for Jägermeister. Hangovers make for great music, too.

Brian Wilson

What in the world is a hangover cure?

Bill Cosby

Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.

Carrie Fisher

Everything grows rounder and wider and weirder, and I sit here in the middle of it all and wonder who in the world you will turn out to be.

Bethenny Frankel

I love pregnancy and the bump and the whole thing.

Al Franken

Teen pregnancy went way down in the '90s, and 75 percent of it was because of increased use of contraception.

Celine Dion

Family and friends and Rene and the pregnancy fulfilled me with so much love.

Carroll Quigley

It is this power structure which the Radical Right in the United States has been attacking for years in the belief that they are attacking the Communists.

Carnie Wilson

It's normal to gain weight during pregnancy. It's something that has to happen to your body.

Carnie Wilson

Was I a perfect gastric-bypass patient? Yes. Was I a perfect gastric-bypass pregnant woman? No. I made a decision to enjoy my pregnancy... So sue me!

Dionne Warwick

My parents gave me stability and a belief in myself and in all the possibilities life has to offer. I was told the only limitations I would ever face were those I placed upon myself.