Famous Quotes & Sayings

Carol Moseley Braun

I'm used to people not paying me a whole lot of attention and underestimating me and, frankly, for me a big challenge is to have people believe that I can be the president of the United States.

Carol Moseley Braun

I believe that our message of rebuilding America is one that will resonate with the American people.

Carlos Mencia

I don't have the time to steal other people's material even if I wanted to. The reason why these rumors got started is that I don't really contest them because I don't believe they deserve contesting. I really don't.

Carlos Mencia

God has a sense of humor. If you don't believe me, tomorrow go to wal-mart and just look at people.

Carlos Ghosn

I don't believe in hostile moves. I don't believe they carry any value.

Carlos Ghosn

Don't believe what I say. Believe what I do.

Carlos Castaneda

... when confronted with unusual life situations... A warrior acts as if nothing had ever happened, because he doesn't believe in anything, yet he accepts everything at its face value.

Carlos Castaneda

What is wrong with us human beings, and has been wrong since time immemorial, is that without ever stating it in so many words, we believe that we have entered the realm of immortality. We behave as if we are never going to die - an infantile arrogance. But even more injurious than this sense of immortality is what comes with it : the sense that we can engulf this inconcievable universe with our minds.

Carl Bernstein

Even at the end of a presidential election campaign, we have no way to know what Mitt Romney really believes.

Alan Thicke

If one tends to be a humorous person and you have a sense of humor the rest of your life then you can certainly lighten the load, I think, by bringing that to your trials and tribulations. It's easy to have a sense of humor when everything is going well.

Charlie Chaplin

Quebec from the boat looked like the ramparts where Hamlet's ghost might have walked.

Charlie Chaplin

Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.

Charles Dickens

There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

Dave Barry

The Romans spent the next 200 years using their great engineering skill to construct ruins all over Europe.

Mike Birbiglia

When I moved to New York, I was wide-eyed. I was nice to everyone, which comedians hate.

Tracy Morgan

So I think all comedians are earning their wings into heaven. We're all going to heaven, but everybody's not going to get their wings. Some people are just going to be regular angels. Doing cleanup, janitor work. In heaven, I'm going to sit on the couch with Oprah.

Dave Chappelle

I've been a comedian since I was fourteen. But I've never really been a CEO.

Alan Moore

Well, what do you expect? The Comedian is dead.

Nica Burns

The Perrier is about helping to discover new talent. In years to come, this generation of young comedians who are stepping into the spotlight will be setting the heather alight.

Nica Burns

The Perrier is about helping to discover new talent, ... In years to come, this generation of young comedians who are stepping into the spotlight will be setting the heather alight.

Maria Bamford

As far as I can tell, comedians are pretty serious people, and that's why they make fun of things all of the time.

Louis C. K.

Comedians work great as actors because they're good under pressure. With a lot of actors, you have to make them feel like everything's going really well to get a good performance out of them. But, if you have a comedian on the set, you can tell them, 'Hey, you really are screwing this up,' and then they just get better.

Jamie Foxx

I love music. I've always wanted to do music, even when I started out as a comedian.