Famous Quotes & Sayings

Charles Caleb Colton

Expect not praise without envy until you are dead.

Charles Dickens

There are many pleasant fictions of the law in constant operation, but there is not one so pleasant or practically humorous as that which supposes every man to be of equal value in its impartial eye, and the benefits of all laws to be equally attainable by all men, without the smallest reference to the furniture of their pockets.

Charles Simmons

Good Humor is the best shield against the darts of satirical raillery

Alan Watts

The reason we want to go on and on is because we live in an impoverished present.

Alan Moore

Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

Charles Stuart Calverley

Meaning, however, is no great matter.

Charles Stross

Can I remember "I remember lots," I say. How much of what I remember is true is another matter.

Akshay Kumar

Work is work, but family is for life. That's what really matters to me.

Frank Stronach

We want to show the world that no matter where you're born, no matter how poor you are, that you can succeed in life.

Chris Colfer

There's no solution to life, there's going to be problems no matter what.

Chris Bosh

I wouldn't like to make anybody cry, I don't dislike anybody. It doesn't even matter - the opponent is always faceless.

Darren Shan

But in life we don't usually get to choose the time of our defining moments. We just have to stand and face them when they come, no matter what sort of a state we're in.

David Mitchell

- This isn't an interrogation or a trail. Your version of the truth is the only thing that matters. -Truth is singular. It's 'versions' are mistruths.

Dave Barry

What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK.