Scott Adams
Scott Adams
Scott Raymond Adamsis an American cartoonist, creator of the Dilbert comic strip and the author of several nonfiction works of satire, commentary, business, and general speculation...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionCartoonist
Date of Birth8 June 1957
CityWindham, NY
CountryUnited States of America
ahead game guys hands leaders toughest win
Our guys know they are about to play the toughest game on our schedule. We know what is ahead of us with seeding and the playoffs. But all that is in the hands of our leaders and veterans. If they want to go out and win these games, then they can.
bad convention guiding guys principles run work
He used to be a lawyer. It's a different set of guiding principles at work there. Personally, I wouldn't want to run into any of these guys at the big convention after I said something bad about them.
behind case characters describe funnier guy
If you read it for a while, you feel like you know the guy behind it, and that makes it funnier for me. The characters are unbelievably well-defined. I've often made the case that if you can't describe the character in one or two words, then it's not going to work. And he does that.
knowing guy doubt
The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out. Sure, there's a lot more living to go, but there isn't much doubt that I'll always be the 'Dilbert guy.' Unless I go on a crime spree, in which case I'll be that stabbin Dilbert guy.
years guy important
You don't argue with a four-year old about why he shouldn't eat candy for dinner. You don't punch a mentally handicapped guy even if he punches you first. And you don't argue when a women tells you she's only making 80 cents to your dollar. It's the path of least resistance. You save your energy for more important battles.
best stir
When you find a big kettle of crazy, it's best not to stir it.
looking warm
This year, we are looking for a warm day in the 30s.
humor technology mail
I get mail; therefore I am.
business smart differences
Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
worry
You can hose it down and never have to worry about it.
commonly complete computer crystal facts known methods predicting referred tarot tea waste
There are many methods for predicting the future. For example, you can read horoscopes, tea leaves, tarot cards, or crystal balls. Collectively, these methods are known as "nutty methods." Or you can put well-researched facts into sophisticated computer models, more commonly referred to as "a complete waste of time.
ask bother chair nobody wake walking
I don't even bother walking to the couch, because there's nobody going to come in and see me. When I wake up I ask myself if I feel like working, and if I do, I get back in the chair and I work. If I don't, I do something else.
erase thousand
One "oh shit" can erase a thousand attaboys
five people quicker realize speed top
One thing people don't realize is that you take off a lot quicker than you could ever stop. You can get up to 100 in five seconds, but that top speed back to zero, it doesn't brake as well as it accelerates.