Mark Twain

Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
clever men ass
At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
clever lying blood
The Bible is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies. This Bible is built mainly out of fragments of older Bibles that had their day and crumbled to ruin. So it noticeably lacks in originality, necessarily. Its three or four most imposing and impressive events all happened in earlier Bibles; there are only two new things in it: hell, for one, and that singular heaven I have told you about.
clever law lunch
A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch.
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Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?
funny clever men
What a man misses mostly in heaven is company.
life funny-inspirational clever
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
learning trouble wages
What's the use you learning to do right, when it's troublesome to do right and ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same?
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When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home to mama
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When a man is known to have no settled convictions of his own he can't convict other people
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The statue that advertises its modesty with a fig leaf really brings its modesty under suspicion
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The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive, but in spite of their religion, not because of it
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I shall not often meddle with politics, because we have a political Editor who is already excellent and only needs to serve a term or two in the penitentiary to be perfect
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The world will not stop and think- it never does, it is not its way; its way is to generalize from a single sample
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The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people but if we tried to shut up the insane we would run out of building materials.