Jay Leno
Jay Leno
James Douglas Muir "Jay" Leno is an American comedian, actor and television host. He was the host of NBC's The Tonight Show with Jay Leno from 1992 to 2009. Beginning in September 2009, Leno started a primetime talk show, titled The Jay Leno Show, which aired weeknights at 10:00 p.m. ET, also on NBC...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Show Host
Date of Birth28 April 1950
CityNew Rochelle, NY
CountryUnited States of America
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Have you noticed how the Republicans and Democrats try to copy each other at their conventions. Like at the Democratic convention John Kerry's daughter told a story about how he once gave CPR to her hamster. At the Republican convention the Bush girls are going to tell a story about how when their hamster was bad, their dad built them a little electric chair.
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When did the government become our psycho ex-girlfriend
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A second Homeland Security official has been arrested, a 49-year-old guy named Frank Figueroa, he was caught exposing and fondling himself to a teenage girl in a shopping mall in Florida. Do you realize? If Osama bin Laden was a 14-year old girl, we would have had him by now. ... Who is going to start protecting us from the Department of Homeland Security? ... It kind of makes you long for the good old wholesome days of the Clinton administration.
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You could do anything in your room at college. You could smoke pot, live in a coed dorm, have a girl. But you couldn't have a . . . hot plate!
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I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'
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President Obama admitted this week that a former girlfriend that he wrote about in his autobiography was made up and not a real person . . . So Obama had an imaginary girlfriend. Big deal! He had an imaginary economic plan. It’s all the same.
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It was very funny. It was agony for him when it was 'stolen' from the yard. Women think it's so cruel. Guys think it's hilarious. It's a guy thing I guess.
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I thought he looked quite good in his flight suit landing on the aircraft carrier. He looked very natural, like he wore it everyday. It was like seeing Dick Cheney in a hospital gown. It looked like the most normal thing in the world.
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Man, what is it down to, just a couple of voters?
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I don't deserve to be on that show.
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NBC fired pinhead Peter Arnett. He gave an interview on Iraqi television criticizing the U.S. military and saying our battle plan was all wrong. The good news is, after he said that, today he was given an honorary Oscar.
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Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.
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Tom Brokaw is leaving. Dan Rather is leaving. You realize the most trusted guy in television news will wind up being Geraldo Rivera.
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You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh... it's as simple as that.