Henry Cloud
Henry Cloud
Henry Cloud, PhD is an American Christian self help author. Cloud co-authored Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life in 1992 which sold two million copies and evolved into a five-part series...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionPsychologist
CountryUnited States of America
games numbers dating
Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is.
real school essence
In a very real way, ownership is the essence of leadership. When you are ridiculously in charge, then you own whatever happens in a company, school, et cetera.
self ideas wife
The idea of submission is never meant to allow someone to overstep another's boundaries. Submission only has meaning in the context of boundaries, for boundaries promote self-control and freedom. If a wife is not free and in control of herself, she is not submitting anyway. She is a slave subject to a slave driver, and she is out of the will of God.
heart mean responsibility
When we can't hold back, or set boundaries, on what comes from our lips, our words are in charge-not us. But we are still responsible for those words. Our words do not come from somewhere outside of us, as if we were a ventriloquist's dummy. They are the product of our hearts. Our saying, "I didn't mean that," is probably better translated, "I didn't want you to know I thought that about you." We need to take responsibility for our words. "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken" (Matt. 12:36).
real responsibility leader
A leader's responsibility is to cause a vision and mission to have tangible results in the real world.
leader church visionaries
Oftentimes, churches are started by an entrepreneurial church plant visionary whom everybody follows, but he's not following anybody. Even though he's "accountable to a board," he's really not. Authority's a good thing, and if it's not forced upon you as a leader, then I suggest, strongly, that you go buy some.
kids parenting reality
If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you 'do' boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.
party writing heart
The Bible is clear about two principles: (1) We always need to forgive, but (2) we don’t always achieve reconciliation. Forgiveness is something that we do in our hearts; we release someone from a debt that they owe us. We write off the person’s debt, and she no longer owes us. We no longer condemn her. She is clean. Only one party is needed for forgiveness: me. The person who owes me a debt does not have to ask my forgiveness. It is a work of grace in my heart.
giving-up growth return
To get greater than 100% return on a growth step, give up defensiveness. Defensiveness stifles performance, and destroys relationships.
team struggle responsibility
The twin sister to autonomy and freedom is responsibility and accountability. You cannot have one with out the other. If someone is given an area of responsibility, not only must they be set free to do it, they must also be held accountable for what they do. Accountability clarifies freedom. In the teams and companies where you see boundary confusion, power struggles, control, over-reaching of one's line of responsibility, you will also see lapses in accountability as well.
feel-better next-day needs
We need rest not just so we feel better. We need rest for actual creation of what we're going to need the next day.
hurt reality differences
There is a big difference between hurt and harm. We all hurt sometimes in facing hard truths, but it makes us grow. It can be the source of huge growth. That is not harmful. Harm is when you damage someone. Facing reality is usually not a damaging experience, even though it can hurt.
pain growth steps
Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
handle amount
The amount of truth a relationship can handle is proportional to the amount of perceived love that's present.